Podcasts by Category
The Football Ramble is a global podcasting institution. Since 2007, the Ramble has provided entertainment, analysis and coverage of the Premier League and beyond for football fans who don't take the world's biggest sport too seriously.
In 2024, the takes are as strong as ever, the jokes are as funny as ever and the Ramble remains as essential as it ever was for football fans everywhere. Join them several times a week as they discuss the world's biggest football stories in their inimitable style.
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- 2170 - Ramble Reacts: Everton halt Klopp’s last dance
As Liverpool found out, all the romantic farewell narrative in the world can’t stop a freshly tracksuit-bottomed Sean Dyche delivering a hammer blow to your title chances. And what a performance from that new lad, Daniel Calvert-Lewin!
Marcus and Luke give their takes on a dismal night for Liverpool which needed a calm slot into the bottom corner, but instead got Darwin Núñez desperately smashing the ball into Jordan Pickford’s meaty thighs. Elsewhere, Erik ten Hag serves up smiley faces covered in chocolate sauce (again), there's an unwelcome reminder of Paul Jewell’s jewel, and we have live reports from Pete Donaldson on Jason Tindall Watch at Selhurst Park. What more could you ask for!
We're back on stage! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Tickets go on sale on Friday at footballramblelive.com. You can get presale tickets from Thursday 25th at 10am by signing up to our mailing list here!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 25 Apr 2024 - 37min - 2169 - Hathaway the lads
“We’ve just beat Chelsea 5-0. Shall we take this upstairs?” Marcus, Luke, Pete and Vish react to a demolition job at the Emirates and some extremely intimate celebrations for the Arsenal fans.
Elsewhere, the Ramblers show their support for Gary Neville being taken to task, even if Nottingham Forest are still embarrassing. Speaking of which, Luke also gives his thoughts on Erik ten Hag’s latest press conference. Plus, Marcus prepares to honour Bruce Forsyth live at The London Palladium!
We're back on stage! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Tickets go on sale on Friday at footballramblelive.com. You can get presale tickets right now by signing up to our Patreon here or sign up to our mailing list here and get them straight in your inbox tomorrow!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
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Wed, 24 Apr 2024 - 1h 02min - 2168 - Razzle and dazzle
Marcus is calling for more corruption from officials after VAR correctly ruled out Coventry’s winner against Man United. At least the result means Erik ten Hag might keep his Job. So there is something for us all to enjoy.
Elsewhere, Marcus, Jim and Pete investigate another huge conspiracy after hearing rumours that the VAR official in the Everton vs Forest game was a HUGE Football Ramble fan. Speaking of which, who invited José Mourinho to watch Liverpool play at Craven Cottage?
We're back on stage! Join us at London Palladium on Friday September 20th 2024 for 'Football Ramble: Time Tunnel', a journey through football history like no other. Expect loads of laughs, all your Ramble favourites, and absolutely everything on Pete's USB stick. Tickets go on sale on Friday at footballramblelive.com. You can get presale tickets on Thursday by signing up to our mailing list here or even earlier on Wednesday by signing up to our Patreon here!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
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Mon, 22 Apr 2024 - 53min - 2167 - THE FOOTBALL RAMBLE IS RETURNING TO THE STAGE!
For the first time in five long years, the Football Ramble is back on the stage!
On Friday 20th September 2024, we’re performing a very special show at the London Palladium. And we want YOU to join us!
For one night only, Football Ramble: Time Tunnel will guide you through the most outrageous and hilarious moments in football across the last 17 years of the Ramble.
General sale goes LIVE on Friday April 26th at 10am BST at footballramblelive.com.
BUT if you want to get to the front of the queue, you can get PRESALE tickets on the Football Ramble Patreon from Wednesday at 10am BST! Just sign up at patreon.com/footballramble.
You can also join our brand new Mailing List, The Team Sheet, where you’ll receive presale tickets on Thursday at 10am BST. Sign up HERE!
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Mon, 22 Apr 2024 - 1min - 2166 - Mailbag: How Pep Guardiola has changed English football
Pep Guardiola arrived at Manchester City almost 8 years ago. A reign that started with sacking Joe Hart has turned into one the most impactful managerial careers in Premier League history. Today, Marcus, Andy and Luke assess how Pep has revolutionised the English game.
Elsewhere, Luke explains we it is a joke that the player of the season is being awarded already. Plus, the Ramblers re-call some of their favourite mass celebrations and assess what food would be best to fire out of a T-shirt gun. It’s another classic Mailbag!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 20 Apr 2024 - 32min - 2165 - The Preview Show: It makes me Schick
Shhh of course we knew that yellow cards don’t carry over to a penalty shootout! In Emi Martinez we trust.
Marcus, Luke, Andy and Pete catch up after last night’s European frolickings and then realise that the FA Cup has crept up on us. Alejandro Garnacho shows digital contrition ahead of Man United’s semi-final against Coventry City, Paul Scholes gets his old chap out, and players injure themselves trying to avoid a club crest but show a #touchofclass.
Plus, Portsmouth players swearing a lot on radio, Luke shares a message for the cowardly Vithushan Ehantharajah and Pete tells everyone how to use a knife and fork.
Sign up to our brand new mailing list, The Team Sheet, right here!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 19 Apr 2024 - 1h 02min - 2164 - Ramble Reacts: Little old Real Madrid
How about them plucky underdogs Real Madrid, eh? Marcus and Vish are on hand to react to a disastrous evening in Europe for the English sides.
On a night which saw Erling Haaland subbed before extra time, Vish asks whether Man City had too many cooks and no one to eat the pudding. In Munich, Arsenal also appeared to be lacking an appetite as they failed to trouble Bayern. We wonder where Arsenal go from here to ensure they can get the results when it really counts.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 18 Apr 2024 - 37min - 2163 - Yabadabadoo
Barcelona may have lost the tie last night, but have they won the war to become the Champions League’s next banter club? Today, Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to review a night of Champos action that at times resembled a drunken brawl - and they bloody enjoyed it!
You know what they also bloody enjoyed? Portsmouth returning to the Championship! And they created the perfect conditions for a pitch invasion...
Plus, Andy compares Mauricio Pochettino to Tim Sherwood, Jim starts an unexpected campaign to unite the people of London, and the lads outline the ONLY circumstance in which Arsenal will want to hear Bayern Munich play the Can-can this evening.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 17 Apr 2024 - 53min - 2162 - Crack the whip
What’s that noise? Is that the sound of Euro-trash floating from Lineker’s Bar? That’s right, Pete thinks it’s official: Jack Grealish is already planing his post-title win sesh.
Marcus, Jim and Pete react to a huge weekend at the top of the Premier League as both Liverpool and Arsenal promptly put their special carton of Premier League celebration milk back into the freezer (more on that at the end of the show). Plus, has Thierry Henry started shrinking yet? Has someone in the Brentford area named their baby after Marcus Speller? And what happens when you bring a bottle of water to a whip fight? Just ask Al-Ittihad striker Abderrazak Hamdallah. Come join us!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Mon, 15 Apr 2024 - 51min - 2161 - Mailbag: Could Premier League games ever be played overseas?
Marcus, Andy and Pete text an anonymous burner phone and get a fresh batch of listener questions delivered to the studio - and there are some crackers!
We wonder if a Premier League game could - and should - be played overseas after FIFA’s change of tune this week. Also, should professional fouls be dealt with more harshly? And which animal would cause maximum chaos if released onto a football pitch?
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 13 Apr 2024 - 29min - 2160 - The Preview Show: Atabanta
Was last night Jürgen Klopp's final European game at Anfield? If so it didn't end well. Today, Marcus, Andy and Pete are here to remind Klopp that going out of the Europa League would at least mean he is on the beach a week earlier...
Elsewhere, Pete expresses his jealousy towards John McGinn’s large bum and, in an unrelated turn of events, he and Andy explain how they are coping with their midlife crises.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 12 Apr 2024 - 58min - 2159 - Ramble Reacts: Barcelona’s kids silence Mbappé
Also, Xavi was wearing Stone Island on the touchline, so we can only assume he and his XL bully were waiting for Luis Enrique in the carpark.
Marcus and Jim look back on two entertaining Champions League quarter-finals! Well, spare a thought for Marcus having to watch Atlético try to sit on a 2-0 lead…
Plus, a reappraisal of Rodrigo de Paul (aka Messi’s bouncer) and his hair, speculation about Ronaldinho’s night out in Paris, and unconfirmed reports that Diego Simeone is making his players forage for food.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 11 Apr 2024 - 32min - 2158 - I’m gonna need a bigger telly
How about that football, eh? Last night’s Champions League action was so good that Andy has decided he needs to get a second big telly to watch all the barns burn at once.
Marcus, Jim, Vish and Andy reflect on Arsenal showing glimpses of their ITV era last night and marvel at the quality of goals on display in Madrid. Plus, Andy explains why Sporting manager Rúben Amorim would be a good fit for Liverpool.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 10 Apr 2024 - 54min - 2157 - Always do your doggies
Did you know that if you’re a Tottenham player you can punch a Nottingham Forest player on a Sunday afternoon without punishment? Today Marcus, Luke and Jim applaud James Maddison’s knowledge and application of that rule this weekend.
Elsewhere, Luke compares Man United vs Liverpool to Pulp Fiction and Jim dismisses James Ward-Prowse scoring from a corner because it was “wind-assisted”. Plus, the Ramblers officially declare the business end of the season OPEN!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Mon, 08 Apr 2024 - 58min - 2156 - Mailbag: Is football punditry becoming more divisive?
Marcus, Luke and Jim are back in Correspondence Corner tackling some more of your cracking questions!
We start with an interesting one: in the age of mass media coverage and scrabbling for social media clicks, is football punditry becoming more divisive and are club biases paraded around too often?
We also wonder which players or managers missed their chance at a big move, and we pitch some dream football documentaries about past teams and seasons. if anyone fancies making Jack Grealish: Uncovered with us, let us know.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 06 Apr 2024 - 33min - 2155 - The Preview Show: No barns left to burn
What… on EARTH was that?! Marcus, Luke and Jim recap Cole Palmer 4-3 Moments FC, where perhaps the biggest takeaway from one of the most ridiculous games you’ll ever see was: you’ve got to feel sorry for Harry Maguire.
Elsewhere, Chris Wilder finds himself snookered, Vincent Kompany is forced to manage Burnley’s next crucial game from a blimp and we stumble across one of the most outrageously-named footballers you’ll ever find.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 05 Apr 2024 - 53min - 2154 - Ramble Reacts: Tickly bum time for Man City and Arsenal
Marcus didn’t think he’d ever make this comparison but… Phil Foden went full-blown Wayne Rooney against Aston Villa! It was a stunning hat-trick. But what were Villa doing leaving the serving hatch of their wall wide open for his first goal?
Marcus and Jim react to victories for Man City and Arsenal which keep the title race cookin’. Plus, Marcus impersonates Jim’s dad and Steve Bruce reveals he has a tickly bum. Join us!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 03 Apr 2024 - 31min - 2153 - Whoever wins, we lose
Marcus, Luke and Jim dive into yet more Barclays action, as a gloriously violent cameo from Newcastle's Paul Dummett gave Everton some much-needed points. Generous, innit.
Elsewhere, journalists continue to ask Mad Pep some even madder questions, Morgan Gibbs-White turns into primetime Zinedine Zidane and Liverpool prepare to use their Sheffield United at home voucher. A midweek treat!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 03 Apr 2024 - 47min - 2152 - Barclays Barnburners Deluxe™
Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete return after Man City 0-0 Arsenal to find the barn very much intact. Wasn’t even remotely burned. Pep Guardiola still found plenty to be angry about, of course.
Luckily there were plenty of other Barclays bangers to get stuck into, as Man United somehow escaped Brentford with a point, West Ham somehow lost a crazy game at Newcastle, and Chelsea somehow remain the most mid-table club in the division. According to Mauricio Pochettino, anyway - he thinks they should be fourth, you see.
Plus, Pete’s clumsy South Korean adventures and Mark Puppetmaster Clattenburg’s at it again - join us for a Bank Holiday blockbuster!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Mon, 01 Apr 2024 - 1h 06min - 2151 - Mailbag: Which manager will have achieved the most by winning the Premier League?
Luke, Jim and Vish kick off proceedings with an intriguing question about this season’s incredible title race: for which manager would winning the league be the biggest achievement?
Plus, we’re building some famous football statues in some offensive locations and we finalise the definitive list of collective nouns for different clubs’ supporters.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 30 Mar 2024 - 31min - 2150 - The Preview Show: The Fleece of Champions
Three things we didn’t expect in the studio today: a hammer, Sean Connery, and loads of Wellman supplements after Pete played table tennis against David Gandy. It can only be Preview Show time!
Pete, Luke, Jim and Vish – wielding said hammer – look forward to the return of the Premier League and the absolute egg-melter that is Man City vs Arsenal. Plus, an alarming email about mascots with human hands inspires the lads to construct our own Ramble mascot and the Luke Nation holds its breath for Jack’s Encyclopaedia…
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 29 Mar 2024 - 1h 00min - 2149 - England Special: Who should start at Euro 2024?
Back in November Marcus and Luke picked their England starting XI for Euro 2024. Four months and a lot of football later it’s now time for the lads to re-visit their selections. Are they still starting Harry Maguire and Kalvin Phillips? Where should England play Phil Foden? Strike up the band, we’ve officially got Euros fever!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 28 Mar 2024 - 41min - 2148 - He’s dead, Vish
Marcus, Andy, Luke and Vish are here with some consoling words for our Welsh brethren, after their Euros journey fell at the final hurdle last night. Here’s hoping they triumph in their next Penalty Competition™.
Elsewhere, England let the handbrake off and nabbed a draw against Belgium - might be worth putting the handbrake back on, as it turns out. Plus, Georgia get to showcase their incredible bread selection at the Euros for the first time and Vish dredges up some dead Scotsmen to inspire them ahead of their summer escapades.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 27 Mar 2024 - 54min - 2147 - Dr Feelgood Factor
England may have lost to Brazil but you can’t create the feelgood factor without having a bad moment first, right? Today, Marcus, Jim, Vish and Pete hold onto that hope and book Kobbie Mainoo a seat on the plane after seeing that one turn in the second half. Oooft.
Elsewhere, the lads take heart in realising France are now sh*t after they lost to Germany and James McFadden vows never to return to Amsterdam after Scotland got gubbed by the Netherlands. Plus, what objects could a linesman hide in his flag? Pete has some thoughts...
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Mon, 25 Mar 2024 - 50min - 2146 - Mailbag: Has Gareth Southgate been a success for England?
The narrative that has been created around Southgate is one of squandered opportunities and an inability to match tactics against the elite in Europe. Is that fair? Would a penalty shootout win against Italy have changed everything? Marcus, Andy and Vish explore that on today’s show.
Elsewhere, Vish makes his case for Brazil as the defining international team in football history. Plus, could Bagpipes be the new Vuvuzela?
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 23 Mar 2024 - 27min - 2145 - The Preview Show: Virtue-signalling about something
It’s international week! Marcus, Andy, Vish and Jim leave the boffins behind for Anthony Hopkins and Robbie Savage giving Wales’ next team-talk, Matt Berry giving England’s next team-talk, and a heartbreaking defeat for San Marino…
We also discuss Nike’s change to the St George’s cross on the latest England kit which has led to sleepless nights for all of us and the heel returns to Jack’s Encyclopaedia. It’s Vish’s Vagabonds!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 22 Mar 2024 - 58min - 2144 - Ramble Uncut: Santa in Lanzarote, the worst taxi driver ever, and blimps
As a special Thursday treat, we're bringing you this week's Patreon-exclusive edition of Ramble Uncut! Luke reveals what happened when a man donned a Santa costume to calm down a group of angry Celtic fans, Jim thinks he's found the worst taxi driver in the world, and a listener informs us of a stunning revelation pertaining to blimps...
To join the conversation every single week, head over to patreon.com/footballramble! You'll also join over thriving Discord community with thousands of other Friends of the Ramble. So, what are you waiting for?
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 21 Mar 2024 - 24min - 2143 - The Boffin's Premier League
Kobbie Mainoo is the latest addition to Gareth’s Governors so naturally, Marcus is swinging from the chandelier. Before that however, the boffins at the Premier League are forcing Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish to wade through an annoying amount of admin after Nottingham Forest’s points deduction. Maybe that’s the real deterrent?
Elsewhere, the Ramblers get hyped for Wales' huge Euros play-off, Vish tries to determine if he has eaten in the same Nandos as Bukayo Saka and Jim reveals that Frank Sinatra almost played John McClane in Die Hard. Yippee Ki‐Yay!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 20 Mar 2024 - 43min - 2142 - Can I have the little fish?
Vish is on the pod, Vish is on the pod!! Today, Pete celebrated the return of the man of the bat by going through his old tweets. Concerning…
Elsewhere, Luke tells Marcus, Vish and Pete that he thinks Man United vs Liverpool was the barn-burner of the season. However, he also reveals that it wasn’t even the most exciting thing to happen this weekend after he had a bust up on X with Matt Le Tissier’s daughter-in-law. On a related note, Marcus also tells us how a “jocular slap” from Sean Dyche almost ruined Everton’s warm weather training camp.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Mon, 18 Mar 2024 - 58min - 2141 - Mailbag: What defines a big club?
Are Arcade Fire bigger than Arsenal? Are Hula Hoops bigger than Man City? Should you play without a goalkeeper? How many defenders do you really need at a corner?
Just a small sample of the questions Marcus, Luke and Jim get stuck into on today’s Mailbag.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate us on Spotify. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 16 Mar 2024 - 32min - 2140 - The Preview Show: Thrashing around in their own muck
Marcus, Luke and Jim whizz round the best moments from last night’s European Battle of the Banter, as plenty of English sides impressed and Anthony Taylor delivered the best mugging off you’ll ever see from a ref.
We then look ahead to this weekend’s FA Cup quarter-finals, as Man City face a beleaguered Newcastle and Man Utd face a lawsuit from their own staff. Away from that cup magic, we also prepare Arsenal’s application for the Saudi Mega League™ and Barclays Corporate Entertainment serves up a relegation ding dong!
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Fri, 15 Mar 2024 - 56min - 2139 - Came here for a shootout
Arsenal’s penalty shootout win over Porto was so exhilarating that even the crowd were exhausted at the end - so how do you think a 41 year-old Pepe felt?
Marcus, Jim, Pete and Andy breakdown the game and ask whether Martin Ødegaard could play football in a train station Pret a Manger. Plus, Pete tells us how to hack the UEFA computers ahead of next season’s Champions League draw and Jim has an idea for how Gareth Southgate can get a lifeless Jordan Henderson on the pitch at the Euros.
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Wed, 13 Mar 2024 - 54min - 2138 - Ramble Reacts: Chelsea win and Poch goes for dinner
Chelsea delivered a huge blow to Newcastle’s ambitions for the rest of the season – and a huge blow to Andy Brassell’s hopes of watching them play the runners-up from the Slovenian top-flight next season in the Europa Conference League. And that’s all coming from what could have been the real True Geordie, Pete Donaldson.
Andy joins Pete to react to Chelsea’s 3-2 win over an increasingly beleaguered Newcastle, who Pete describes with probably the most unflattering simile in the history of football analysis. The lads discuss a chaotic game where Cole Palmer dazzled again, Mykhailo Mudryk thankfully didn’t offer out another fan again, and Mauricio Pochettino didn’t cancel dinner with his wife again. Plus, an unexpected appearance from Adam Sandler…
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Tue, 12 Mar 2024 - 30min - 2137 - Conspiracy Campbell
What a weekend in the Prem! And after all the controversy, Pete has a brand new innovation for refereeing. Introducing… The No Context Man, sponsored by Ronseal!
Unlike Andy Townsend, Pete, Andy and Jim have their vouchers for the football buffet and tuck right in. How did Liverpool manage to somehow feel disappointed with a draw having started with that lineup against Man City? Why is Mikel Arteta at it again on his whiteboard? And Neil Warnock’s left Aberdeen ALREADY!?
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Mon, 11 Mar 2024 - 52min - 2136 - Mailbag: How should football copy other sports?
Jim, Andy and Rhythmic Pete Donaldson are back with another rummage in the postbag, addressing listener questions and problems with the poise and dignity you’ve come to expect.
We start by wondering what aspects of other sports football should steal - a draft system? Pausing for afternoon tea? Mario Balotelli smashing up a car?
We also place a few of our favourite pre-Premier League footballers in some 2024 line-ups and decide which teams should change their kit colours for prison jumpsuits.
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Sat, 09 Mar 2024 - 22min - 2135 - The Preview Show: Something rude about the Queen
Pete, Andy and Jim run the rule over last night’s European action – and then turn to the big one, Liverpool vs Man City, Klopp vs Pep, Trent vs… Haaland.
The lads discuss that particular war of words – plus, Roma welcome Brighton with an obscene banner about the Queen and Gary Neville is set to meet the Glazers. And some glazers. Join us!
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Fri, 08 Mar 2024 - 48min - 2134 - Tender Loving Football
The Champions League is back! Marcus, Jim, Andy and Pete run the rule over last night’s clashes, which proved that all you need for European success is a couple of brave English boys and King Kylian.
We also check in with some potential Mauricio Pochettino alternatives at the Bridge, Richarlison auditions for Curb Your Enthusiasm and Sean Dyche parachutes in to save the UK government. Plus: which McDonald’s menu item would make the best shin pads?
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Wed, 06 Mar 2024 - 43min - 2133 - Ramble Reacts: Sheffield United bring a knife to a gunfight
On a bruising night for Sheffield United, Marcus and Andy pick apart their season and whether it was always destined to end this way.
They also rub their hands over what looks to be the most exciting Premier League title race in years between Arsenal, Man City and Liverpool, and decide that Kai Havertz’s random milestone is definitely worth a sparkler or two. Come join us!
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Tue, 05 Mar 2024 - 29min - 2132 - Let me in, Paul
Mark Clattenburg is banging on the door of the studio asking for answers, but we just about managed to keep him out and record a brand new Ramble!
Marcus, Luke, Jim and Pete discuss controversy at the City Ground, have a stern word with Phil Foden about how to fire a crossbow, and Pete shares some of his own tales from the BRITs after Ivan Toney pops up there!
Marcus also makes an extra spot in the England squad for a certain in-form England midfielder in Turkey…
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Mon, 04 Mar 2024 - 57min - 2131 - Mailbag: What makes a great derby?
What are the characteristics of a great derby? Are half and half scarves REALLY that bad? Do we criticise refs too much? Who are the most unexpected famous fans of our clubs?
Marcus, Luke and Andy have the keys to answer those questions on today’s Mailbag.
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Sat, 02 Mar 2024 - 34min - 2130 - The Preview Show: Three of your five meats a day
It’s Manchester derby weekend! And there’s one question on everyone’s lips here at the Ramble: will a pie be thrown?
Marcus, Luke and Andy talk about those stunning scenes at the Edinburgh derby and ask whether Erik Ten Hag should really be asking for an apology from Fulham’s TikTok account.
Luke and Andy lock horns over the Paul Pogba ban and then over Jack’s Encyclopaedia, where there is perhaps the most unexpected winning answer in Ramble history. David Icke is all we’re saying. Join us for a Friday blockbuster!
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Fri, 01 Mar 2024 - 1h 00min - 2129 - Ramble Reacts: Casemiro's crucial bonce
We have our FA Cup quarter-final lineup! And – oh no – Pete sees who Newcastle have drawn while recording the show. But which better Ramble shoulder to cry on than Luke’s?
Pete and Luke reflect on a laboured victory for Manchester United that kept them in the hat and another night of Antony being the most predictable winger in the world. Luke also celebrates the return of Normal Bloke Wayne Rooney to our screens and Mark Clattenburg’s roll-neck gets a VAR replay of its own.
Plus, why Liverpool’s Jayden Danns’ Eurovision background means he’s destined for stardom – and there’s a shocking revelation about the identity of Luke’s father. Join us!
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Wed, 28 Feb 2024 - 35min - 2128 - Small Donny energy
After last night’s FA Cup action, we’re one step closer to Pete spending a load of money so he can watch Newcastle lose to Man City at Wembley. Today, Marcus, Pete, Jim and Andy take a moment to enjoy that fact before debating whether Leicester edging out Bournemouth 1-0 really classes as a cupset.
Elsewhere, the lads get excited for Wayne Rooney’s punditry debut, Pete launches a new career as a self-help guru, and Marcus explains why we might not know who gets relegated from the Premier League until June.
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Wed, 28 Feb 2024 - 44min - 2127 - Ramble Reacts: Take a Bowen
Jarrod Bowen scored his first senior hat-trick and, in an amazing turn of events, it’s got Andy waving the Bowen for England flag harder than Marcus! Probably because he’s too busy waving his Neal Maupay for France flag, to be honest…
Marcus and Andy react to an entertaining game at the London Stadium. The “is David Moyes the right man for West Ham?” debate still rages on though as Andy compares it to Brexit. Plus, the lads get behind Coventry in the FA Cup now that the Maidstone United dream is over!
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Mon, 26 Feb 2024 - 27min - 2126 - Pete’s grotty mind
The only thing grottier than the Carabao Cup trophy after John Terry’s done with it? Pete’s mind, obviously.
Marcus, Jim and Pete are back for your ultimate Carabao Cup final review! We hurl a few lemons at Mauricio Pochettino, Pete reveals that Peter Utaka is back in business in Japan, and MLS returns with a fizz! You know what that means.
And no prizes for guessing what Marcus’ highlight of the weekend was…
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Mon, 26 Feb 2024 - 51min - 2125 - The Best of Ramble Uncut
Head to patreon.com/footballramble for more of this every single Wednesday!
Each Wednesday, our Patreon subscribers get an extended edition of the Football Ramble for their ears only. So today, we thought we'd give everyone a taste of some of our favourite moments from Ramble Uncut over the past couple of months!
Want to become a Friend of the Ramble, too? Just click the link – patreon.com/footballramble – to find out more!
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Mon, 26 Feb 2024 - 19min - 2124 - Mailbag: Do fans prefer not being in the Premier League?
Earlier this week, Luke made the point that supporting a struggling Premier League club is worse than people realise. So today, he’s joined by Marcus and Andy to get their views on whether life is really better outside of the Prem. Marcus regales us with his memories of Fulham winning the Championship, while Andy tells us about watching Wimbledon play in all of the top nine divisions of English football.
There are also plenty of wicked whispers, as Marcus reveals what country he'd support if he couldn't support England and we finally find out which football club Andy respects the least.
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Sat, 24 Feb 2024 - 27min - 2123 - The Preview Show: Do it for Todd
It’s the big one! The Carabao Cup final, where Chelsea will be fighting for not only a tenth of the amount of money you need to make Liam Gallagher to go away, but also the prestigious honour of being banned from European competition for spending too much.
Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim look ahead to Todd's big weekend. They also ask whether all Jims are evil, how Chris Wilder will have taken the news of his fine over sandwich-gate, and bid farewell to Big Joe Hart! Plus, one of the best Jack’s Encyclopaedia rounds ever, we swear. But was it for the Luke Nation? Don’t miss it!
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Fri, 23 Feb 2024 - 1h 04min - 2122 - Ramble Reacts: Arsenal’s last-gasp defeat
It was unfortunately business as usual for Arsenal on their return to the Champions League knockouts, after their last-minute loss to Porto. But, what did you expect from Pepe n’ co?
Marcus and Jim recap a timid performance from the Gunners and wonder how far they’ll go in Europe this season. Plus, Liverpool knock Luton Town into next week and Barcelona go hunting for a mole - reports are it’s not a literal one
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Wed, 21 Feb 2024 - 30min - 2121 - David Raya’s big hands
Believe it or not there was some Premier League action last night, even if Jim did have to take the train to France to watch it on TV. Today, Luke and Jim are joined by Pete who’s in the chair to do a 6/10 job of hosting the Ramble (his own words).
The Ramblers discuss Michael Beale using burner accounts on Twitter (currently known as X), Luke reveals he saw Steve Parish and Oliver Glasner having a romantic day out, and they link Jason Statham with the Assistant Manager position at Crystal Palace.
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Wed, 21 Feb 2024 - 55min - 2120 - Ramble Reacts: Palace hold on and Roy bows out
For perhaps the final time, Roy Hodgson leaves the managerial arena. And what more fitting tribute to his career than being mentioned in the same breath as Steve Bruce hustling for the South Korea job, eh?
Pete and Andy react to a night at Goodison Park that was somehow both open and cagey as Everton and Crystal Palace split the points! Elsewhere, Andy reveals why Oliver Glasner could get Palace challenging for Europe in the long-term and they discuss whether Dominic Calvert-Lewin’s finishing will ever catch up with his looks again. Plus, there really are more horrendous managerial links than you can shake a stick at – including Bayern Munich sniffing around for Ole Gunnar Solksjaer. That’s right, Ole Gunnar Bloody Solskjaer. Join us!
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Tue, 20 Feb 2024 - 33min - 2119 - Sammy Lee’s Trebors
Did Harry Styles eat some Trebor Mints extracted from Sammy Lee’s arsehole, will Ross Barkley be made the sheriff of Luton, and is it a good idea for footballers to get their shins lengthened?
Pete, Jim and Luke are on hand to answer those burning questions and much more after another Premier League weekend! Plus, Phil Neville’s dream date, Mark Clattenburg pops up very unexpectedly, and Pete forgets one of the most famous people in the world. Join us!
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Mon, 19 Feb 2024 - 53min - 2118 - Mailbag: Is there still a place for firefighter managers in the Premier League?
With Roy Hodgson’s time at Crystal Palace seemingly drawing to a close, is this the end for the traditional firefighter manager? Marcus, Jim and Andy debate that on today’s Mailbag.
Elsewhere, Andy explains why Franck Ribéry is the most unique footballer he’s seen, Marcus compares Arjen Robben to John Wick and Jim suggests what he would buy Kevin Keegan for his birthday.
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Sat, 17 Feb 2024 - 30min - 2117 - The Preview Show: MBellingham
Marcus, Jim, Andy and Pete are back in the Ramble ring! But it’s a sad day, really. Jürgen Klinsmann has been sacked by South Korea! Insert crying emoji on Zoom.
As well as waving farewell to Klinsmann, we react to news that Kylian Mbappé is finally - FINALLY - bidding farewell to PSG and heading straight to Newcastle after watching Dan Burn up close. Plus, the latest on Roy Hodgson and Crystal Palace and the latest on Wayne Rooney, who has reached a common crossroads in his career. Stick with football management, or beat up a YouTuber half my age? It’s the eternal question. Come join us for all that and more!
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Fri, 16 Feb 2024 - 54min - 2116 - You give yellow cards a bad name
Things most of us predicted last night: a dominant Man City win. Things only Nigel Clough predicted last night: Mansfield Town beating Harrogate Town 9-2. And guess what? Harrogate didn't get a single yellow card.
Marcus, Luke, Jim and Andy are fuming! They also debate whether we would let Elon Musk buy the Ramble and decide that Jim and Jude Bellingham should play in midfield together at the Euros. IT'S COMING HOME!
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Wed, 14 Feb 2024 - 46min - 2115 - Ramble Reacts: Chelsea win it late
It’s all going wrong for Crystal Palace, should they employ Andy Brassell as gaffer until the end of the season? Luke and Andy are here to discuss why Palace may need an interim solution to their managerial dilemma.
In the meantime, Luke explains why Palace could have been more positive in the game itself and the lads react to Petr Čech explaining why he would have obviously saved Jefferson Lerma’s goal. Oh… Andy also thinks Čech should take up building Lego. Listen to find out more!
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Mon, 12 Feb 2024 - 35min - 2114 - A skulleted fiend
Ivory Coast won AFCON! Managerless, thrashed by Equatorial Guinea earlier in the tournament, and with Sebastien Haller grabbing the winner after overcoming cancer barely 12 months ago, last night really was one of the great ‘that’s what football do to ya’ moments! What we want to know is… does the manager they sacked after the group stages still get a place on the victory bus?
Marcus, Luke and Pete discuss the weekend’s two big continental cup finals and – unfortunately for West Ham fans – plenty of Prem action, too. Luke “inadvertently” starts a debate with some Hammers, Pete launches his bid to be new dictator of the United Kingdom, and we discover that Ivan Toney has a new Captain Tom tattoo. Plus, Joel Glazer finds a new role at Manchester United as a ‘filthy magician’…
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Mon, 12 Feb 2024 - 56min - 2113 - Mailbag: How to improve the Champions League
The jury is still out on whether the new Champions League format will be a success. Can Marcus, Luke and Pete design a better competition? They try their best on today’s Mailbag.
After that, the Ramblers re-lived the last time an event in football totally shocked them and make some recommendations for José Mourinho and what he should do next in his career… Gareth Southgate's replacement?
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Sat, 10 Feb 2024 - 33min - 2112 - The Preview Show: Norty Boyz
Luke and Pete are delighted to hear that Marcus has eschewed some spicy matches this weekend and instead opened the show with news of England’s 2024/25 Nations League opponents. Get the bunting up!
We do find time to preview those matches because Spurs vs Brighton could be a dingdong, there’s a big relegation rumble and we’ve got our AFCON finalists! Plus, Derek Adams inspirational time at Ross County comes to an end and Kevin Keegan’s got yet another hosting gig. Start your engines...
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Fri, 09 Feb 2024 - 59min - 2111 - Typhoid Neil
On today's Ramble, Marcus gets ready to celebrate England winning a World Cup, Jim talks about Nathan Jones, Andy talks about watching Arturo Vidal at Bayer Leverkusen...
And Pete compares Neil Warnock to an infectious disease.
What else would you want? Listen now!
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Wed, 07 Feb 2024 - 47min - 2110 - Ramble Reacts: Phil Foden runs the show
Wait, what’s that rumble? Is it Manchester City galloping towards the front of the title race? Or Pete’s belly after eating that remaining half of Christmas panettone?
Pete and Andy are back to react to more midweek Prem action, as Brentford put up a brave display but ultimately couldn’t stop Manchester City. They chat Phil Foden - from his excellent goals, to his crap celebrations - and Andy delivers a prophecy of doom for Brentford. Plus, Jesse Lingard arrives in Seoul and receives a strange gift…
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Mon, 05 Feb 2024 - 32min - 2109 - The lemons have gone off
One last job, Ramblers. One last job for Neil Warnock AND Jose Mourinho?! We cannot believe our luck.
Marcus, Luke and Jim look back on an epic weekend of Premier League football that saw a whopping 41 goals – none of which should really be celebrated, should they? The lads discuss Arsenal’s victory over Liverpool and the post-match scenes – plus, Luke climbs down from his Luton Town prediction and Marcus climbs up on his Aston Villa prediction. Like, really far up.
It was also another bad weekend for Mauricio Pochettino’s lemons and Chris Wilder continues his crusade against sandwiches. Come join us!
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Mon, 05 Feb 2024 - 1h 01min - 2108 - Mailbag: Do we overestimate the impact of managers?
As the dust still settles on Jürgen Klopp's surprise announcement last week, one listener had a big question for us today: just how important are managers? Today, Marcus, Luke and Jim debate whether the media overstate their importance in football.
Elsewhere, Jim wishes he could have been present for one of the most iconic changing room bust-ups in football history and Marcus offers the listeners his services as a wedding MC if required. With added Nick Hewer, of course…
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Sat, 03 Feb 2024 - 32min - 2107 - The Preview Show: A night out in Seoul with Pete Donaldson
An ice museum. An erotic museum. Easy access to suits in Gangnam. What more could Jesse Lingard possibly want in Seoul?
Pete tells Marcus, Luke and Jim all about the wonders the city has to offer after one of the most surprising stories we’ve ever heard on deadline day. Plus, why footballers need to start freshening up their ‘projectile’ celebrations, Piers Morgan positions himself in the away end at the Emirates, and there’s the small matter of Wolves 3-4 Manchester United. WHAT a game. Join us!
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Fri, 02 Feb 2024 - 58min - 2106 - Ramble Reacts: Wotsits for goalposts
Luke and Pete are here and they are discussing the approved materials for goalposts following Darwin Nunez’s record-breaking performance last night. Cheesy Wotsits anyone?
On top of that, they fear for Chelsea since they look like a team who recently met in the car park and speculate over whether the upcoming documentary has anything to do with Jürgen Klopp quitting Liverpool. Plus, Pete plans what he would write on his paper sign if he ever went to the darts.
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Wed, 31 Jan 2024 - 36min - 2105 - Elton John’s heliplopter
Tom Lockyer returns to Kenilworth Road and Luton score two goals in the first two minutes. Coincidence? Marcus, Andy, Jim and Pete think not!
Today, the Ramblers gather after an evening of Premier League action which left Pete disappointed that Fabian Schär didn’t score a hat-trick for Newcastle and Marcus revelling in Mikel Arteta embracing his inner Donald Trump. Plus, we hear about how Elton John plans to spend his retirement…
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Wed, 31 Jan 2024 - 54min - 2104 - The Carrington Flu Room
The Maidstone United fairytale continues! Marcus, Luke and Jim shake off their Belfast hangover to look back on the FA Cup fourth round, where The Stones marched on (or rolled in one fan’s case), Erik Ten Hag struggled to give away a bottle of wine, and David Wagner obligingly rolled over for a belly rub to kick off Jürgen Klopp’s farewell tour.
We also address the difficult scenes at the Hawthorns, which led to a long delay in the Black Country derby. Plus, the ghost of Jose Mourinho takes another managerial casualty and DR Congo’s goalkeeper channels his inner Michelle McManus. Said literally no one ever.
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Mon, 29 Jan 2024 - 55min - 2103 - Mailbag: Why is the transfer window so quiet?
Has Everton’s point deductions made clubs scared to spend money in January? Does Harry Kane leaving Spurs explain their upturn in form? And which former footballer has a Ramble listener sat next to at the theatre this week?
The weekend is wide open and Marcus, Luke and Andy are here to serve you up another Mailbag!
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Sat, 27 Jan 2024 - 27min - 2102 - Ramble Reacts: Jürgen Klopp is leaving Liverpool!
Jürgen Klopp has announced that this will be his final season as Liverpool manager. What’s going on?! Will he join Germany after the Euros? Is Xabi Alonso the heir to his throne? And do you know Klopp’s middle name?
The news broke moments after we recorded the Preview Show, so we simply had to discuss all that and much more!
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Fri, 26 Jan 2024 - 20min - 2101 - The Preview Show: Woke-verhampton Wanderers
The FA Cup returns! Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim bring you more heartwarming tales from the football world – from former Wolves stalwart Jonny smashing up TVs, to Antony doing circles in a Saudi Arabian palace after a £200m move.
There’s also Spurs creeping into Pep’s head, David Wagner and Jürgen Klopp sing David Hasselhoff together, and we form football’s next great powerhouse: Guinea United.
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Fri, 26 Jan 2024 - 53min - 2100 - Ramble Reacts: Fulham’s dream is over
Marcus has arrived, wind-swept and heartbroken, from Craven Cottage ready to record a Ramble Reacts with his old pal Andy Brassell.
Despite the result, Marcus tells Andy why Issa Diop’s goal was one of his favourite Fulham goals in recent memory. Plus, Andy explains how Jürgen Klopp could be becoming more and more like José Mourinho and the lads take a moment to get excited for another Liverpool vs Chelsea cup final penalty shoot-out…
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Thu, 25 Jan 2024 - 24min - 2099 - Nevvo Baby
Marcus, Jim, Pete and Andy pick through the wreckage of Chelsea’s demolition job on a spirited Middlesbrough - a club that Pete regards with an almost insulting level of indifference.
Elsewhere, we check in with the latest El Chiringuito livestream after their bizarre attempted hit job on Jose Mourinho, who’s probably too busy eyeing up the Newcastle job to notice. We also discuss Kalvin Phillips’ intriguing move and the totally uncontroversial news of Miguel Almiron’s potential transfer to Saudi Arabia - and our favourite Nevvo baby strikes again over in Portland!
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Wed, 24 Jan 2024 - 41min - 2098 - Ramble Reacts: Wolves steal the Seagulls’ chips
Marcus and Luke wade through thin South Coast gruel after Wolves left Brighton with a decent goalless draw. Gag O’Neil was certainly happy, anyway.
We also tip our hats to James Milner who continues to defy biology and check in with an outrageous shock at AFCON. Also: how did Gareth Bale ended up so ripped, despite only eating mountains of baked beans before games?
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Mon, 22 Jan 2024 - 30min - 2097 - Write another letter, you cowards
Fire up the PGMOL paper shredder, it’s another action-packed weekend in the Premier League! Marcus, Luke, Pete and Jim are here to pick up the pieces.
We discuss Ivan Toney’s free-kick shenanigans, the return of one of Manchester United’s cult heroes (read: shocking signings) at the Africa Cup of Nations, and Ross County manager Derek Adams continues his one-man campaign to destroy his own team’s confidence.
Plus, Pete delivers another one of his father in-law’s top three most disappointing moments with a helping hand from Sheffield United and Jim has a novel suggestion for Crystal Palace’s owl problem…
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Mon, 22 Jan 2024 - 54min - 2096 - Mailbag: Is there really good stuff on X?
Social media has just become an accepted part of modern football, but is it really a good thing and does it actually make you feel closer to your club? Marcus, Jim and Vish debate that on today’s Mailbag before coming to a conclusion that would improve everything… Matt Le Tissier has to write every footballer's tweets.
Elsewhere, they share their most surprising player comebacks and Vish accuses Thierry Henry of looking 'weathered'. We’ll let you make up your own mind on that one.
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Sat, 20 Jan 2024 - 30min - 2095 - The Preview Show: Cayman Island United
A message for Forest Green Rovers: Pete Donaldson is available for the dugout. Please find our reference in the following episode…
Marcus, Vish and Jim look ahead to the weekend, with some innovative ideas for managers to brand their players with club tattoos, Arsène Wenger being very voyeuristic at people’s weddings, and Marcus incurring the wrath of the Swifties. And there’s a big grudge match to finish the show!
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Fri, 19 Jan 2024 - 58min - 2094 - Ramble Reacts: FA Cup solace for Forest and Everton
Jordan Henderson pulling out of Saudi Arabia? After six months? Completely unpaid?! Fire up the Ramble Reacts…
Pete and Andy discuss two important victories for the two Premier League clubs in the dock this week, while Roy ‘The Arrogant Owl’ Hodgson digs himself in a little deeper. Plus, an unexpected call for reform at Southend Airport and an even more unexpected cameo from Isaac Hayden in the continuing Everton melodrama.
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Thu, 18 Jan 2024 - 31min - 2093 - Moyes out, EastEnders in
A big cupset in the FA Cup 3rd Round! Today, Marcus confirms to Luke, Vish and Jim that he is now a Moyes Out man after West Ham crashed out to Bristol City last night. He did take EastEnders off air after all…
Elsewhere, the Ramblers try to assess whether the owners of Everton and Nottingham Forest have cause for complaint after the latest Premier League profit and sustainability charges. But speaking of competent owners... can anyone resist the temptation of an unemployed José Mourinho?!
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Wed, 17 Jan 2024 - 51min - 2092 - You’ve been Gaffneyed!
Pete is back on the pod! And he’s back with a bang. Or a crack, actually…
He joins Marcus and Vish to discuss Kevin De Bruyne’s terrifying (and luscious) return to the Premier League, unwelcome news about Salt Bae’s meat thermometer, and whether Birmingham City manager Tony Mowbray actually came up with Tony’s Chocolonely. We’ll get back to you on that one.
We also have just enough time to reveal the hard honest truth about E.T. and Mark Clattenburg’s imminent new tattoo before Wesley Fofana drives into the studio. Join us!
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Mon, 15 Jan 2024 - 55min - 2091 - Mailbag: Have the Premier League fixed the winter break dilemma?
England fans once blamed a Steven Gerrard misplaced pass at the Euros on the fact that he didn’t have a winter break... obviously. Today, Marcus, Jim and Vish discuss whether this new-look January schedule is finally the solution to Premier League burnout.
Elsewhere, what do Zinedine Zidane, Philippe Coutinho and Gareth Barry have in common? And we try to decide on one wildcard spot for the England squad in the summer! Theo Walcott, anyone?
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Sat, 13 Jan 2024 - 27min - 2090 - The Preview Show: We’re off to Baden-Baden
The Prem is back with a big ol’ relegation six-pointer! Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish preview that and a whole lot more.
We wonder in what state Kevin De Bruyne will return to Premier League action against Newcastle, Phil Brown gets last one shot at management before he gets the Bargain Hunt gig, and there is a MAJOR headloss in the final round of Jack’s Encyclopaedia.
And, of course, to one of our long-time favourite characters in football: Sven, we’re wishing you well.
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Fri, 12 Jan 2024 - 54min - 2089 - Ramble Reacts: Liverpool find a way
In a twist that left Marcus’ aunt practically choking on her Victoria sponge, Liverpool turned the first leg of their Carabao Cup semi-final on its head after going behind against Marco Silva’s men! But then Fulham do have a chance of winning the Euro Millions. So, you know, there is always that.
Marcus and Jim reflect on an intriguing encounter where Liverpool once again found a way to win thanks to the only person who’s more Scouse than then Scouse cat. Will they ever stop winning from a goal down? Plus, you’ll never believe the mega prize money for the Carabao Cup and you certainly WILL believe how Jose Mourinho’s Roma spent their evening.
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Thu, 11 Jan 2024 - 25min - 2088 - One foot in a bucket of Carabao
Football recently lost one of its greats. Today, Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish remember Franz Beckenbauer – a player who reinvented his position and whose name has more significance than almost anyone else in the sport, though not without controversy.
Elsewhere, Marcus jinxes Middlesbrough after their historic win against Chelsea last night, before we ask the question on everyone's lips: why haven't Man United signed Jesse Lingard yet?! Jim then puts some well-deserved cake in Marcus’ face after Dominic Calvert-Lewin has his three-match suspension for getting sent off against Crystal Palace overturned.
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Wed, 10 Jan 2024 - 50min - 2087 - A Man of the Prat
That’s (almost) a wrap on the FA Cup third round! And we’re already looking forward to Liverpool playing Maidstone United on a plastic pitch at 12:30 in a few weeks’ time…
Marcus, Luke and Vish look back on some of the best bits from one of the best weekends in the football calendar. Jason Tindall pulling on Sunderland fans’ heartstrings? Darwin Nunez playing a fan’s head like a drum? And a Pascal Chimbonda update?! Yes please.
Plus, there’s the small matter of football’s true fairytale on FA Cup weekend: Jordan Henderson wants a return to the Premier League. Tune in for our reaction to all that and much more!
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Mon, 08 Jan 2024 - 1h 01min - 2086 - Mailbag: How would we change the FA Cup?
Should FA Cup underdogs be allowed to choose whether they play at home or away? Marcus Speller thinks so. Today he, Luke and Jim discuss the one change they would each make to improve the world’s oldest cup competition.
Speaking of making improvements, Jim also makes the case for banning Sweet Caroline from football. Plus, we hear from a listener that once beat Jamie Redknapp at Table Tennis.
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Sat, 06 Jan 2024 - 27min - 2085 - The Preview Show: Cheer up Peter Reid
It’s FA Cup third round weekend! And what a curtain-raiser it was last night on ITV4…
Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish discuss Sunderland gaffes ahead of the derby, Arsenal moaning ahead of their clash with Liverpool, and why Paul Cook is definitely ready to spring a cupset!
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Fri, 05 Jan 2024 - 55min - 2084 - The Liz Truss of Football
Wayne Rooney lasted longer than the cabbage. And at least he didn’t have one thrown at him like Steve Bruce.
Marcus, Luke, Andy and Vish discuss the exit of Luke Littler’s younger brother from Birmingham City and just why useful-FIFA-Committee-idiot-in-waiting Garry Cook appointed him in the first place.
We also ponder West Ham fans’ split on Davide Moyes and – in totally normal news – Gianluigi Buffon wants goals to be made bigger and the Argentina FA retire the men’s national team number 10 shirt. Is that… Diego Maradona with an air rifle?
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Wed, 03 Jan 2024 - 51min - 2083 - Happy New Year, bro
Festive football has almost drawn to a close and the highlight is most definitely Noni Madueke calling friend of the Ramble Jules Breach “bro”. Marcus, Andy, Jim and Vish react to that and share their displeasure that Liverpool vs Newcastle didn’t end 4-3. Just for old times’ sake.
Elsewhere, Marcus makes his case for why Arsenal need a Tom Cairney in midfield and Vish explains why he isn’t surprised a goalkeeper scored a worldie for Arbroath. Plus, we hear the new Roy Hodgson “let’s not take the piss here” extended cut!
**Please note that only UK listeners are eligible to enter our Toshiba competition!**
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Tue, 02 Jan 2024 - 57min - 2082 - Our New Year’s Resolutions for Football in 2024
Football’s great - but it’s not perfect. As a new year rolls around, we thought it was a perfect time to decide on some resolutions that football should definitely adopt. All of them. Even the ridiculous ones.
Marcus, Jim, Luke and Vish bring some idea of their own, from shot clocks and sartorial guidance to fundamentally destroying the fabric of the game. Plus, we sift through a boatload of suggestions from you lovely lot, which mainly focus on spanking and Gary Neville’s goalgasm.
**Please note that only UK listeners are eligible to enter our Toshiba competition!**
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Mon, 01 Jan 2024 - 38min - 2081 - What is the Football Ramble?
Looking for a new podcast in 2024? This is what we’re all about! Hit subscribe for five episodes a week from the most entertaining football podcast out there.
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Sun, 31 Dec 2023 - 0min - 2080 - Mailbag: Why doesn't England produce more elite coaches?
Marcus, Andy and Jim are back to answer more of your questions, and we’re kicking off with one that’s dominated English football discourse for years: why doesn't England produce many elite coaches?
Whether it’s a lack of intelligent football discussion (guilty), the FA resting on their laurels or dwindling opportunities in the Premier League, there’s loads to get stuck into. We then undo all our cutting insight by dreaming up some footballers’ appearances on celebrity cooking shows. Who would Jose Mourinho poison an unsuspecting victim with a pufferfish? And would Big Sam know his way around a Massaman curry?
**Please note that only UK listeners are eligible to enter our Toshiba competition!**
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Sat, 30 Dec 2023 - 25min - 2079 - The Preview Show: The Tartan Diego Simeone
If you’re going to make one New Year’s resolution, make it this: watch the Indian national team at the Asian Cup. Why, you ask? Trevor Sinclair has just been made their overhead kick coach.
Marcus, Andy and Jim look back on a bitterly disappointing night for Arsenal and Konstantinos Mavropanos, who had to go through the Scott Sinclair Moral Maze™ of scoring against a club he barely played for.
Plus, Roberto De Zerbi harnesses yet more chaotic energy, Phil Foden gets praise from a different bald fraud, and Jim explains how Jose Mourinho played mind games with his family on Christmas Day…
**Please note that only UK listeners are eligible to enter our Toshiba competition!**
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Fri, 29 Dec 2023 - 56min - 2078 - Best of the Football Ramble 2023 (Part 2)
We’re back with more fond reminisces! On today’s episode, we return to a difficult day for VAR and an even more difficult day for Pete Donaldson’s Twitter mentions. Plus, some of the worst stadium trivia you will ever hear in Jack’s Encyclopaedia and an update on Andy Carroll’s French renaissance!
If you missed it, catch Part 1 of our 2023 throwback which came out on Boxing Day!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Thu, 28 Dec 2023 - 39min - 2077 - Oi, Doswell!
Boxing Day, you never disappoint. Marcus, Andy and Luke are here and full of the joys of Christmas! And Luke can confirm that one Gosport Borough fan definitely was too…
We discuss Man United’s Christmas miracle and everything you need to know about Sir Jim Ratcliffe’s deal (translation: we talk about his haunted pub). After another defeat for Newcastle, are reports that Eddie Howe is in trouble absolutely out of the question?
Plus, a detour to Egypt for our two new favourite football club names and what’s that coming over the hill… it’s Felipe Melo on all fours!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 27 Dec 2023 - 50min - 2076 - Best of the Football Ramble 2023 (Part 1)
Today, we’re throwing it back to the start of 2023 and reliving some of our favourite Ramble moments!
The final stretch of the 2022/23 season saw some “proper gubbings", including Liverpool's seven-goal demolition of Man United. Oh, and don't forget the poor bloke who went to fill up his car and returned to his radio to find Spurs 5-0 down to Newcastle. The first half of 2023 of course also featured Andy losing his head at Luke during a game of Jack’s Encyclopaedia and our glorious trip to Wembley! And remember, Vish will never be a better bloke than Bukayo Saka…
Make sure to join us for Part 2 on Thursday!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Tue, 26 Dec 2023 - 37min - 2075 - Ramble Reacts: A turkey leg each at Anfield
Jim Campbell is happy with a point at Anfield. However, he’s not so happy with Zinchenko attempting to do the Stanky Legg when faced up against Mohamed Salah in the box.
He and Luke tuck into the festive feast served up by Liverpool and Arsenal, before enjoying Robbie Fowler sticking the boot into Michael Owen for dessert. Plus, Jim admits he would move in with Peter Drury for the rest of the year if it meant Arsenal win the league.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 23 Dec 2023 - 31min - 2074 - Mailbag: Would the European Super League improve English football?
Our listener Christian has a theory: could a European Super League actually improve English football? Marcus, Luke and Andy debate the merits of that suggestion on today’s Mailbag.
Elsewhere, Luke explains why someone should make a biopic all about Paolo Maldini’s tennis career and there's agreement that humiliation is the key to improving players' conduct in football!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Sat, 23 Dec 2023 - 27min - 2073 - The Preview Show: Incubating Pep’s head
What reason would Roy Hodgson have to incubate Pep Guardiola? I don’t know.
It’s cold outside, but Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim are here to warm your footballing hearts with tales of Hodgson looking after his owl eggs, Ross County’s manager having a full-blown rant about the standard of Scottish football, and Gary O’Neil almost certainly getting a contentious penalty decision against him and his team on Christmas Eve! Probably in the 92nd minute.
Plus, can Luke Darth Moore at last turn his fortunes around on Jack’s Encyclopaedia before the end of the year? Tune in to find out!
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Fri, 22 Dec 2023 - 50min - 2072 - Ramble Reacts: Liverpool hammer the Hammers!
Marcus needs consoling. Again. That’s because Fulham have been drawn against Liverpool in a two-legged semi-final. Oh no...
Luke joins Marcus to react to Liverpool dishing out yet another defeat to poor old David Moyes, who made history by becoming the first manager to try and play a Carabao Cup quarter-final via email. Plus, why Santa has been dragged into the middle of the Celtic-Rangers rivalry and bold predictions that Steve Cooper’s going to pop up in the Bournemouth end at the weekend. Probably topless.
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
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Wed, 20 Dec 2023 - 34min - 2071 - Arnie the Cockney Parrot
The Carabao’s back! Today, Jim and Andy have to console Marcus after Kieran Trippier - aka one of Gareth Southgate's brave boys - suffered a difficult night at Stamford Bridge. At least Fulham won!
Speaking of Southgate, Marcus touts Steve Cooper as the next England manager now that he’s been sacked by Nottingham Forest. Plus, we hear from a cockney parrot and learn about some West Ham fans that crashed a boat into Hammersmith Bridge…
Follow us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and YouTube, and email us here: show@footballramble.com.
Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows and a visit from Pete Donaldson to put some fluid up your wall for just $5 per month: patreon.com/footballramble.
***Please take the time to rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your pods. It means a great deal to the show and will make it easier for other potential listeners to find us. Thanks!***
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Wed, 20 Dec 2023 - 49min
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