American Filth

Has America already had a gay president??? Or was he just a fussy, prissy, well-dressed guy?? James Buchanan lived with the same man for decades in Washington, and many people find that pretty sus!

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Men continue to sleep in the same bed and maybe...give a little head. This time the couple in question shared a bed for four years. But yeah! Maybe they were just roommates! Or is Abraham Lincoln actually a little bit gay? 

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Some South Carolinian politicians in the 1820s did a lot more than sleeping. Just ask their fleshen poles. 

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Religious group? Sex cult? Polyamorous filth? Silverware manufacturer? The Oneida Community had it all. 

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Progressive reformers are like, AH WHITE SLAVERY! And they pass a law to protect WHITE LADIES from PROSTITUTION! But then criminals are like, I'm going to exploit this. 

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Mae West brings Sex to Broadway but also...gay people?? 

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Wow, a true crime story!! Did this man kill his wife and daughter in 1845? Or did he kill EVEN MORE PEOPLE??

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Touching yourself too much? Have you tried eating some cereal?? John Harvey Kellogg was a chastity crusader who could solve any horned up feelings you have. Come learn how to abstain and get those hands out your own pants! 

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In 1873, a woman finds a husband from a newspaper ad. But turns out... he sucks. 

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In a small colonial settlement in Virginia in 1629, an indentured servant is confusing the heck out of everyone. Some people swear the servant is a dude named Thomas. But others are like, no, she's a lady named Thomasine! 

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Did you know we have gross presidents??? Well, President Grover Cleveland, aka Steve Cleve, was one of the grossest. 

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Stephanie St. Clair ran Harlem's underground. But she came up against police and other mobsters, and one or twice, she shot her boyfriends.  

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To get you in the mood for Valentine's Day, let's indulge in some of the filthiest lyrics ever written. And yes, they are from the 1920s and 30s.

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When the haters* get you down, douse 'em in some tar and stick on some feathers. 

*Britain 

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 In the mid to late 19th century, the seven Sutherland sisters were the talk of the town. Why?? Because they had a lot of hair. 49 feet in total. If that fell into your soup, there would be no soup left.

But their rags to riches story quickly went back to rags. 

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At the end of the 20th century, most cities were covered in HORSE POO! It was not only gross but also DIRE! Find out how they dealt with this because it smelt quite bad. 

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New Orleans used to have a legal red light district, and it was THRIVING at the turn of the 20th century. But then, of course, war happened and messed it all up!!! Stupid war! 

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Oh my god, can you believe it? Here we got another case of a husband cheating on his wife with his wife's younger sister!! Yuck! But this time, it features a laudanum overdose and America's first novel. 

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Welcome to 2024! To mark this momentous occasion, let's start off with a bang. And who liked banging more than Benjamin Franklin?? Allegedly. 

But there was one person he didn't seem to want to bang. His wife! Today's episode is filled to the brim with hot (re: questionable) takes. 

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The stinky puritans are at it again! This time instead of executing people over hog banging, they are canceling Christmas ONCE AND FOR ALL! Well...until they un-cancel it. Find out WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED! 

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Two presidents received an odd gift: a big-ass wheel of cheese. Why?? How?? From whomst??? Listen to find of these curdled mysteries. 

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A millionaire shoots an architect at the premiere of a really bad musical in 1906. And yeah, it's probably because that millionaire has terrible mental health. But he says that he did it for his wife, Evelyn Nesbit. Listen to learn about how this murder came to be! 

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Did you run out of food on your sea voyage? No worries. It is totally fine to eat your fellow sailors. It's the CUSTOM OF THE SEA! 

Today's episode, the sinking of the whaling ship the Essex, the real history that inspired Moby-Dick. 

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During the Spanish-American War, a bunch of our boys got sick and died... not from the war but maybe from some nasty meat. Or maybe not. But it did smell and taste really bad!

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Noted thief and sex worker Mary Jones stole countless men's wallets in the 1830s and 40s. Robert Haslem was one of those "victims," and he had no shame taking her to court! ! !

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President Lyndon B. Johnson's administration is known for all sorts of stuff, like the Civil Rights Acts of 1964 and 1965, the creation of public radio and television, food stamps, and Medicare and Medicaid. And, of course, escalating the Vietnam War. 

Lyndon did all that...while whipping his dick out all the time. And his wiener? He named it Jumbo! BEWARE: lots of penis puns in this one. Sorry!

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This episode starts with a frothing vat of piss. And the story set in the 1980s, sorry guys, that is history now. Worse than all of that, this episode is about FINE ART. 

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Happy Halloween! Trying to get over that consumption cough?? Have you tried digging up your dead grandma and BURNING HER?!

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James Garfield gets shot, and some doctors stick their nasty fingies in the wound. Yum! 

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Before James Garfield was (briefly) president, he had a fun hobby of cheating on his wife. But it's okay because he felt SO BAD about it. 

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Union soldiers won't stop banging, so they hire a boat. 

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Finally, an episode featuring incest.

Before she married Founding Daddy Gouverneur Morris, Ann Cary "Nancy" Randolph got accused of not just incest but also infanticide! Neat! 

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FDR hates gay sex. Well, sort of. (Also, I don't think I made seamen/semen joke in this episode, which is a real oversight.)

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Watch out for your eyes! 

MAIN SOURCES:

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Founding Daddy Gouverneur Morris is coming for (and on) your wife. 

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Bang a sow! Hang a man! 

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