Beyond Broken Vows | Christian Marriage, Adultery, Pornography Addiction, Sexual Betrayal, Intimacy

Is your marriage thriving after sexual betrayal? Maybe not. Maybe you are just surviving.   You might just be at the beginning of the journey to healing and still don’t even know if you want to stay married. Maybe you and your spouse have been working hard on recovering from this devastation, but you aren’t really connecting in a fulfilling way yet. Or, maybe you have reached a point as a couple where you feel like you have a brand-new marriage, and it’s better than the one you had before betrayal and addiction.   We fall into this last category, but that doesn’t mean we don’t still have very hard days. Can a marriage thrive even while experiencing recurring painful moments from the past? And might this be a marker for how well a marriage is thriving? We'll let you in on one of our recent really hard days and what it taught us.    Our prayer is that everyone listening to our podcast will eventually find the peace and joy of a marriage redeemed by God and made new.  It is not easy getting here or staying here, but it is so worth the effort!   Join us today as we have a vulnerable conversation about thriving vs. surviving in marriage post sexual betrayal.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES:   The Healing Apology (request your copy at support@beyondbrokenvows.com) Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 11. Freedom and Healing: 4 Keys to Unlocking Forgiveness After Sexual Betrayal Episode 23. 7 Steps to True Intimacy After Sexual Betrayal Episode 48. Closing the Gap - 3 Steps to Sexual Intimacy Episode 49. Sobriety vs. Recovery After Porn-Fueled Infidelity   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Wives, has your husband stopped his acting out behavior and is even showing some behaviors that you appreciate, but you still feel like he isn’t a changed man? Do you still feel the distance between you? Like he doesn’t really see you?   Husbands, are you doing all the things your wife has requested and feel like you are moving forward in recovery, but she isn’t responding the way you hope or expect?   Today we are going to talk about an aspect of sexual betrayal recovery we’ve experienced and are now seeing in many of our clients and hearing it from our listeners who write in…Husbands who are sober, but not actively recovering. What’s the difference?   Join us as we unravel this common and sometimes confusing issue in marriages trying to recover from porn-fueled infidelity.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES:   Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 27. Recovery Step 2: Porn Making You Crazy? Believing God Can Restore Your Sanity Episode 31. Recovery Step 4: Who Am I? A Fearless Search - The Origin of My Sex Addiction Episode 38. Recovery Step 9: Become an Action Hero! Righting the Wrongs of Our Destructive Sexual Behavior   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Have you been on the healing journey after sexual betrayal and you and your spouse are ready to level up? Do you want to experience more true intimacy?   Today we will be talking about 3 simple steps to take that are not easy because it will involve some risk. But, if you are looking for intimacy that goes far beyond anything that our world has to offer, it’s so worth it!   So, come spend a little time with us to hear how you can grow closer to your spouse, even if you have already made great progress. There’s much more that God has in store for you!   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 23. 7 Steps to True Intimacy After Sexual Betrayal Episode 24. Would You Marry Your Betraying Spouse Again? Renewing Vows After Porn-Fueled Infidelity. This Time...Mean It.   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Hopefully you’ve heard both sides of our sexual intimacy story, or lack thereof, in episodes 45 and 46. If not, we encourage you to listen to those to gain a better understanding of how we got to the place where our broken marriage got new life after God intervened and recovery began.   Now, we share a wonderfully intimate sexual life together, but it wasn’t easy getting here. On today’s show we will run down the progression of our sex life from Discovery Day and Disclosure Day when Johnny confessed his regular porn use and extra-marital relationships, to our current emotionally safe and sexually satisfying marriage through recovery.   Grab a beverage and listen in for an uplifting conversation about God’s redemptive work in a marriage where both spouses are fully surrendered to Him and each other.    We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe. Ask a question or leave a review.   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                       RELATED EPISODES: Episode 40. Valentine's Day Fails and Favorites Before and After Sexual Betrayal Episode 45. Intimacy with a Sex-Addict in Marriage Episode 46. Sexuality as a Sex-Addict in Marriage   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Men, do you have a secret relationship with pornography and/or others outside of your marriage? Are you consumed by your thought life and hiding things from your wife that you don’t want her to know? Is sex with your wife becoming challenging, difficult, or just too much effort? Do you feel misunderstood? Are you afraid that if she knew everything about you, she would leave you?   Last week, Emily shared her perspective on our sexual relationship through the years up until Discovery Day and Disclosure Day when Johnny came clean of all his secrets. She didn’t know what she didn’t know, which made this area of our life progressively challenging.   Today Johnny is going to share how he viewed our sex life, not knowing he was an addict, but knowing he was hiding secret sin from Emily.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 18. Feeling Like I’m Not Enough. What If Pornography Is Not My True Addiction?   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Ladies, have you spent years trying to connect with your husband in a meaningful and fulfilling way only to find that you just couldn’t get there no matter what you did? Has it ever occurred to you that you may be trying to experience intimacy with a sex-addict? Seems oxymoronic, right? Intimacy with a sex- addict. We think so as well. But how many wives are living this nightmare without knowing why? Over the next 3 weeks we will be sharing our perspectives on the pitfalls of trying to achieve intimacy in marriage when sex-addiction is a behind-the-scenes factor.   Join us as we uncover a picture of sexual disfunction and intimacy anorexia in marriage where porn use and adultery are present.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 12. His Adultery Shattered My Reality. How Do I Know What’s Real? Episode 17. Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Ladies, now that you know your husband has been unfaithful and broken covenant with you; maybe through pornography use, maybe it even escalated to being sexually active outside of your marriage, I want to ask you, what is your biggest fear?   If you are like me, you are afraid that he will do it again. This is a very real and natural thing to be concerned about. Trust me, if it happened once, it can happen again.   Now, if your spouse is in recovery and making good, steady forward progress, it may be easier for you to keep that fear at bay. A track record of trustworthiness is wonderful and comforting. It creates safety for you and brings stability to your marriage.  But also, like me, you may eventually get to a place where he’s doing so well that you don’t think it will happen again and your hopeful optimism can produce an emotional crisis when a slip in recovery occurs.   So, what happens next? What do we do?  These are natural questions to ask and hard to answer when we are blindsided with the reality of persistent sexual integrity issues. This is why we’re going to spend some time talking about Slips and Relapses and the importance of having a Relapse Plan if we find ourselves in that precarious position.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Emily’s Birthday Special – Sign up to get access to discounts on coaching with Emily this week, insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES:   Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                   RELATED EPISODES:   Episode 6. Setting Boundaries After Sexual Betrayal in Marriage When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 39. Recovery Step 10: 4 Ways to Keep Your Relational Slate Clean & Stay Clear of Porn Addiction   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

What happens to a marriage, shattered by porn-fueled infidelity, that doesn’t undertake a specific recovery process? What happens to the individuals in that marriage?     We believe, it’s likely that this marriage will be devoid of real connection and true intimacy. Sure, it is possible to stay married without recovery. Couples can sweep it under the rug denying it’s impact. Or, one spouse may be unwilling to do the hard work of recovery and leave the other feeling not seen and not secure in the marriage. Or, one spouse may want to work hard, but the other can’t find a way to forgive and move forward.   But, is this what you signed up for when you said, “I Do”?   Today we wrap up our series on the 12-Steps of Recovery from Sex Addicts Anonymous. It is our heartfelt desire that if you are in a marriage broken by adultery and betrayal, you will seek out a recovery program that can walk you step-by-step into freedom and peace. And a marriage better than you ever imagined possible.   So, grab a comfortable seat and join us as we share the hope of Jesus through our wrap up of the 12-steps.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES:   Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                       RELATED EPISODES: Episode 39. Recovery Step 10: 4 Ways to Keep Your Relational Slate Clean & Stay Clear of Porn Addiction Episode 41. Recovery Step 11: How Can We Know? 6 Points to Ponder When Seeking God’s Will Episode 42. Recovery Step 12: A Great Awakening - 7 Ways to Serve Others While Healing From Sex Addiction   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     D

Have you ever experienced a life-changing revelation that compelled you to share it with others and integrate it into your life? This is similar to the impact of embracing recovery and is at the very heart of what we felt when we surrendered to Jesus. Today, we will explore the 12th step of recovery, and how we can actively share our message while living out these steps in our daily lives.   So, grab a beverage and something to take notes with and join us as we discuss 7 ways we can share our message of hope with others.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Valentines Special – Sign up to get access to discounts on coaching in February.insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                     RELATED EPISODES: Episode 38. Recovery Step 9: Become an Action Hero! Righting the Wrongs of Our Destructive Sexual Behavior Episode 39. Recovery Step 10: 4 Ways to Keep Your Relational Slate Clean & Stay Clear of Porn Addiction Episode 41. Recovery Step 11: How Can We Know? 6 Points to Ponder When Seeking God’s Will   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Do you find it difficult to connect with God and know his will for your life?   If you said yes, you are not alone. Just like the recovery journey, it takes a lot of persistent and consistent effort to cultivate a close relationship with the Lord. It doesn’t come naturally to us mere humans, but there is a roadmap for discovering how to make connecting with God a priority. It’s found in the Bible. Today we are going to unpack Step 11 of the Sex Addicts Anonymous Recovery Program, which is all about this sometimes elusive yet always fulfilling practice of knowing God and his will for us.    So grab a drink, your Bible, and a pen and join us for this journey into seeking God’s will for our lives and his power to carry it out.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Valentines Special – Sign up to get access to discounts on coaching in February.insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. ( As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                       RELATED EPISODES: Episode 38. Recovery Step 9: Become an Action Hero! Righting the Wrongs of Our Destructive Sexual Behavior Episode 39. Recovery Step 10: 4 Ways to Keep Your Relational Slate Clean & Stay Clear of Porn Addiction   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Let us be the first to wish you a happy Valentine’s Day! Okay, how did that make you feel? Did you smile? Did it make you cringe? Did it bring up a feeling of excitement, or anger or even dread?   We’ve found that Valentine’s Day is a tricky holiday. Well, it’s not a public holiday, but it is a recognized day on the calendar for celebrating love between sweethearts. We’re going to be talking today about the different ways people either love or hate this day that comes around every year with shocking regularity. We're also going to be sharing the nitty gritty of our first Valentine's Day after discovery and reminding you that you are not alone and there is hope for you and your marriage.   So, grab yourself a box of those sugar candy hearts and join us for a revealing look into Valentine’s Day.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! We have a special coaching discount for you in February! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Have questions or comments? Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe.   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                        RELATED EPISODES: Episode 28. Giving Thanks In Your Broken Marriage Through Gratitude Episode 30. Has Adultery Grinched Your Christmas? 2 Ways to Approach Holiday Season Triggers After Sexual Betrayal Episode 33. The Greatest Gift at Christmas: A 12-Stop Journey To God’s Plan for Redemption Episode 34. New Beginnings for Marriages in the New Year After Sexual Betrayal   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Do you have a daily practice of self-reflection? Do you ever stop to take stock in how you act, think, and feel when relating to others? Most of us have heard the phrase - wash, rinse, repeat. And no, we aren’t talking about the latest greatest shampoo. Today as we talk about the 10th Step in SSA Recovery we will peel back the layers of what a daily personal inventory can look like and why we should even do it?   From the Green Book of Recovery: “In the 10th step we embrace the discipline of regular spiritual house-cleaning. Just as we took action to repair the damage we caused in the past, so we continue taking inventory of our behavior, and making amends when needed, in our lives today. Working step 10 helps us deal with our shortcomings on a daily basis. Even with our best efforts, we make mistakes. We are human, and we fall short of the mark regularly, even when we are abstinent from our addictive sexual behavior. In taking the 10th step, we commit to keeping our house in order, whether old failings reappear, or new ones arise, as they inevitably will.”   So grab a pen and notepad and something refreshing to drink and join us for an illuminating conversation on the benefits of daily self-examination.     We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 37. Recovery Step 8: My Addiction To Porn Hurt Others. 4 Questions to Ask When Making it Right Episode 38. Recovery Step 9: Become an Action Hero! Righting the Wrongs of Our Destructive Sexual Behavior   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Last week we asked the question: Have you ever hurt someone and come to not only realize that you hurt them but understood exactly how you hurt them?   This week we want to ask: Have you felt any fear or intimidation when making the choice to go back and right that wrong?   We have a special guest today who is going to share with us his experience with Step 9 of the Sex Addicts Anonymous Recovery Program.   So go ahead and pop in your ear bud and join us! It is time to take action toward those we have harmed through our behavioral choices by making amends.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: The Promises (From Sex Addicts Anonymous) (Discussed in Episode 27 - Step 2) If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations, which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.  Are these extravagant promises? We think not! They are being fulfilled among us sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them.   Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 36. Recovery Step 7: Holding on to Pride? Humility Before God = Freedom From Pornography Episode 37. Recovery Step 8: My Addiction To Porn Hurt Others. 4 Questions to Ask When Making it Right   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Have you ever hurt someone and come to not only realize that you had hurt them, but understood exactly how you hurt them? Today as we cover the 8th step of recovery of Sex Addicts Anonymous, it is time to do the work of making a list of those we've harmed through our destructive sexual behaviors and become willing to make amends.   Working this step means finding the willingness to bring resolution to these relationships, regardless of whether or not those involved behaved rightly toward us. This process of becoming willing to make amends involves a deeper surrender to our higher powers’ will than we have known before.”   Grab a cup of coffee or wine and something to jot down notes with and join us as we explore the process of making amends.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe.com/BeyondBrokenVows   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 35. Recovery Step 6: Ready to Move on From Sexual Integrity Issues? 4 Questions to Help you Decide Episode 36. Recovery Step 7: Holding on to Pride? Humility Before God = Freedom From Pornography   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you come to a place in life where you have been humbled by your own actions and are ready to move forward with hope and integrity? It is time to approach God humbly and ask him do for us what we cannot do for ourselves.   From the Green Book of Recovery: "We may wonder why it is necessary to ask humbly. Many of us have confused humility with humiliation. We were more familiar with pleading for, or demanding what we wanted, than with asking. In fact, it takes humility to ask for help. It means admitting that we are not wholly strong and self-sufficient. It means that we are not too proud or ashamed to believe that we can be helped.   Change occurs in God’s time, not ours. As addicts, we are accustomed to seeking instant gratification. But in recovery, most of us experience gradual improvement rather than sudden transformation."   So, grab a cup of whatever you are telling yourself is healthier than what you did last year and get ready to explore humility before God with us.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 32. Recovery Step 5: What Have I Done? Admitting How My Porn Addiction Hurt Myself and Others Episode 35. Recovery Step 6: Ready to Move on From Sexual Integrity Issues? 4 Questions to Help you Decide   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you come to a place where you understand that some of the things that you do are not beneficial for you? Or are even hurtful to others?   What do you do once you’ve discovered this? Do you say, “Well, that’s just me.” Or, do you decide that you want to change these behaviors for your own good and the good of those you love? If so, how do you go about making these changes?   From the Green Book of Recovery: Character defects are undesirable traits, attitudes, and beliefs that make our lives unmanageable, cause pain to others, and block our spiritual growth. Our problems did not begin with our sex addiction, nor do they end when we get into recovery. Step 6 builds on the recognition that our malady has roots that run deeper than just our acting-out behavior. It requires the willingness to change.Today we will talk about how we take our moral inventory and walk it out in a very practical way.     So, pour out your expired eggnog, grab yourself a fresh Cup o’ Jo and get ready to ask yourself some important questions.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d Drop the Rock co-authored by Bill P., Todd W and Sara S. (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                        RELATED EPISODES: Episode 31. Recovery Step 4: Who Am I? A Fearless Search - The Origin of My Sex Addiction Episode 32. Recovery Step 5: What Have I Done? Admitting How My Porn Addiction Hurt Myself and Others   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you noticed that New Year’s resolutions don’t last much past January for most people? Statistically, 91% of Americans fail at New Year’s resolutions. That’s not very encouraging.   We were going to talk about the reasons why resolutions are so hard to keep in today’s episode, but then Holy Spirit intervened. So, we threw out our outline and just had a candid conversation about our first New Year after sexual betrayal shattered our marriage.   Today, on New Year's Day, we want you to know that resolving to stay in your marriage that has been broken by sexual betrayal is a personal decision and a difficult one. However, if both spouses are willing to surrender to God’s will, do the hard work, and extend lots of mercy and grace - it is very possible and so worth it!   Listen in as we remember what our first New Year’s after betrayal looked like and how we found hope for our future together.   Happy New Year!   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Abide in Christ, by Andrew Murray (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 28. Giving Thanks In Your Broken Marriage Through Gratitude Episode 30. Has Adultery Grinched Your Christmas? 2 Ways to Approach Holiday Season Triggers After Sexual Betrayal Episode 33. The Greatest Gift at Christmas: A 12-Stop Journey To God’s Plan for Redemption   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Before you got married, you had in your head an idea of what you wanted your marriage to look like. You had all kinds of hopes and dreams and they were all good, positive things and you made plans according to this picture in your mind.   But things didn’t go exactly as planned.   This is not the first time this story has played out. God made plans for how he wanted his relationship with mankind to look.   Men, God intended for you to have a work to do, a woman to love and a will to obey.   Women, God created you to be a perfect helper for your man. So important to God that he uses the same word “helper” in the New Testament when describing Holy Spirit.   God planned for us to walk daily with him in the Garden and for us to be naked before each other and not be ashamed. And this form of nakedness is what we refer to today as true intimacy.   But things didn’t go exactly as planned.   That’s because he also gave us free will. When we chose our own way, sin, pain and death were the result. Then God introduced a new plan to bring us back to himself.   You have probably heard the Christmas story from Luke many times. Today we are going to go through not only this incredible story, but also the new plan of redemption that comes through Jesus Christ for all who would believe. Our Savior, our Redeemer, and our Lord.   So, as you join us today, grab your favorite Christmas beverage and settle in for a meaningful journey of hope.   Merry Christmas!   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: A 12-Stop Journey Through the Scriptures Isaiah 9:6-7 Matthew 1:18-23 Luke 2:1-20 Luke 19:10 John 11:50 Luke 23:34 John 19:30 Romans 5:1-8 Revelation 3:19-21 Romans 10:9-10 Hebrews 11:6 Revelation 21:5   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 28. Giving Thanks In Your Broken Marriage Through Gratitude Episode 30. Has Adultery Grinched Your Christmas? 2 Ways to Approach Holiday Season Triggers After Sexual Betrayal   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you gotten to the point in your life where you are ready to tell someone else every terrible thing that you’ve done in your life?   If this thought doesn't excite you or possibly even terrifies you, then you’re in good company. Baring our souls to another person is not something we come by naturally. However, the longer we keep secrets locked behind the door of our minds, the longer we will stay trapped in our addictions and true freedom will continue to elude us.   From the Green Book of Recovery: As active sex addicts, we hid who we were and what we were doing from others, but also from ourselves. We take the 5th step when we come out of hiding, let go of self-deception, and acknowledge our reliance on a higher power. Our belief that we were isolated, estranged from the care of a loving God, had kept us in fear. Now, breaking free of secrecy, we admit our wrongs in the light of our relationship with the God of our understanding. If we trust, we will be given the power to acknowledge our shortcomings. Admitting our wrongs to God opens the door to change within ourselves. We have found that God will help us find the courage and honesty we need in order to work this step.   Today we will talk about how we take our moral inventory and walk it out in a very practical way.     So, heat up your coffee or pour yourself a glass of wine and join us as we learn how to take the courageous step to tell someone else every hidden thing in our past in order to find freedom for our future.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)               RELATED EPISODES: Episode 29. Recovery Step 3: 3 Things To Know When Leaving Porn Behind Episode 31. Recovery Step 4: Who Am I? A Fearless Search - The Origin of My Sex Addiction   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you turned your will and your life over to the care of God? Are you ready to gain an understanding of how you violated your personal moral boundaries and allowed addiction to set into your life? From the Green Book of Recovery: In taking the 4th step, we begin to know ourselves for who we really are. Building on the foundation of the first 3 steps, we take stock of the feelings and patterns that have shaped our lives. We come to realize that our addiction is more than just unmanageable sexual activities; it includes an entire system of underlying thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. If we neglect this inventory, we risk being stuck in our old habits and mistaken beliefs, and our unexamined defects of character will eventually lead us to relapse. By looking honestly at our moral nature – the failings that kept us trapped in our addiction, as well as our virtues and aspirations – we start to move away from being self-centered toward being God-centered.   Today with a good understanding of Steps 1, 2 & 3, we are ready to move onto Step 4.     So, grab your favorite beverage and a notepad and join us as we take a deep look into who we are, why we do the things we do, and how we got here.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Sex Addict Self-Assessment Questionnaire Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 27. Recovery Step 2: Porn Making You Crazy? Believing God Can Restore Your Sanity Episode 29. Recovery Step 3: 3 Things To Know When Leaving Porn Behind   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Is the holiday season hard for you after sexual betrayal? Or any date that reminds you of the devastation that sexual betrayal brings into a marriage? It sure was for us in the beginning.   What is a healthy way to deal with these triggers when they occur?   Today we are going to have a conversation about how these dubious dates affected our marriage and how we worked through them so that they are no longer as painful as they once were.   So, pop in your earbud, grab your favorite Christmas beverage and join us for a peek through the window into our holiday healing.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 22. How Long Will This Hurt? Experiencing The 5 Stages of Grief Through the Lens of Sexual Betrayal Episode 13. His Triggers, Her Triggers – 4 Steps For Dealing With Triggers While Healing From Infidelity   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you admitted your powerlessness over your porn addiction? Have you come to believe that a power greater than yourself can restore you to sanity?   These two questions encapsulate steps 1 and 2 of the Sex Addicts Anonymous 12-step recovery program.  In today’s episode we will unpack Step 3. which focuses on surrendering our plans and path. Are you ready to turn EVERY part of your life over to God? At this point in our program, we are simply willing to move forward. We decide to make a commitment to recovery, and to our spiritual growth.   So, grab your favorite beverage and something to jot down notes and join us as we reveal three things to know about giving it all to God and moving beyond our pornography and sex addiction. Wives, you will want to hear this too!   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 26. Recovery Step 1: Hooked on Porn? Admitting Helplessness Over Pornography’s Pull Episode 27. Recovery Step 2: Porn Making You Crazy? Believing God Can Restore Your Sanity   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

What does Thanksgiving Day mean to you? Here in the United States, it is recognized as a national holiday on the 3rd Thursday of November each year. Today we want to look beyond what’s considered to be the traditional activities of this special day, such as gathering of family, turkey dinner with all the fixings, football, post dinner food comas, all the pies and of course, leftovers. And while all those are very special traditions; we want to take time today to reflect on what it means to truly give thanks and be grateful for what we have been given by God.   We do understand that the holidays can be a very difficult time for those who have experienced sexual betrayal. If you found out about your spouse’s infidelity around the holidays whether this month, a year ago or twenty years ago, memories, triggers and lingering difficult emotions can taint the holiday season. We have found that one of the best ways to deal with these negative experiences is to cultivate a heart of thanksgiving and gratitude. Today we will focus on giving thanks in our relationships with our spouses, families, others, and to God himself.   So, as you join us today, grab your favorite pumpkin spiced whatever and get out your notepad to jot down a few of the ideas we will be sharing with you in this episode.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)   RELATED EPISODES: Episode 05. The Effects of Infidelity and How We Made the Decision to Stay Married After Sexual Betrayal   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Do you see yourself in this vicious cycle of chaos?   When we utilize technology to view pornography and use it for our own sexual satisfaction, then walk away from our devices, it can give us the illusion that we are in control. But how quickly do we shift from promising ourselves that we’re not going to do it again to contemplating what we've seen then anticipating our next opportunity to view only to inevitably return to using pornography to meet our own needs?   Last week we introduced the Step 1 of the Sex Addicts Anonymous 12-step recovery program. Today we will be talking about Step 2 which states, I came to believe that a Power greater than myself could restore me to sanity.   So, grab a pen and your favorite beverage and join us for an enlightening discussion that will give us hope that by reaching beyond ourselves this cycle of insanity can be broken, to experience freedom once and for all.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post contains affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 26. Recovery Step 1: Hooked on Porn? Admitting Helplessness Over Pornography’s Pull   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Does pornography use have a hold on you or someone you love?   Today we are talking about Step 1 of the 12-Step Sex Addicts Anonymous recovery program. This is Johnny’s chosen recovery program so we will be sharing what this step entails, how he approached this step and why it is so imperative to start here. We will also be hearing from Emily on how she views the process and progress of Johnny’s 12-Step recovery journey.   From the Green Book of Recovery: In our addiction we held onto the belief that we were in control of our sexual behavior and could successfully manage our lives. This kept many of us from seeing that we even had a problem. We told ourselves that if we had tried harder, we could have stopped. But our experience has shown otherwise. No matter how many promises or resolutions we made, no matter how strong our efforts and our determination, the behaviors eventually returned, along with their painful consequences. Only when we admit our powerlessness over these behaviors, and our inability to manage our own lives, are we able to begin walking a path of recovery.   We are grateful to the program of Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) that makes our recovery possible.   Grab a pen and something to write on and join us as we lay out the 12 steps of recovery with a deep dive into Step 1.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Green Book - Sex Addicts Anonymous: 3rd Edition Conference Approved Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick Carnes, Ph.d (As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES Episode 16. "It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing Pornography Episode 17. Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior Episode 25. Persistent Sexual Integrity Issues in Marriage. Do Recovery Programs Really Work?   NEXT STEPS   ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

What if you had been confronted with the fact that your life had become unmanageable and through this revelation you discovered that you were powerless over a major struggle in your life? And what if you came to believe that this major struggle in your life was an addiction? You may be asking, "How did I get here? What do I do about it and how do I get out of it?"      If there was a measurable way to reclaim the manageability in your life, would you want to take the steps necessary to repair your broken relationship with your spouse and gain peace for yourself? Even if it turns out to be the hardest work you've ever done?     If you are willing to do this hard work, there is good news!     Today we are going to talk about the discovery of addiction in our lives, how to recover from addiction and why to engage in a recovery program. Buckle up, here we go!     We pray this blesses you,     Johnny and Emily   Hey y’all! Please send us a voice review, ask a question, or make a comment on SpeakPipe. We’d love to hear from you! https://www.speakpipe.com/BeyondBrokenVows   Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Get our weekly newsletter for behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! https://insider.beyondbrokenvows.com _______ Resources: Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)   Be Broken Ministries – Online care groups for wives wanting help to heal from sexual betrayal trauma. https://www.bebroken.org/wives                      _______ Related Episodes: Episode 04. Sharing Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery   _______ Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Up until now, we’ve been talking a lot about taking steps to stabilize, grieve, heal, and renew our marriages after sexual betrayal. We've covered heavy topics like confession, boundaries, apologies, and forgiveness. and in our last episode even dipped our toes into the waters of reigniting sexual connection and what true intimacy looks like.   But today, we're switching gears. We're going to take a step back from the weightier topics for something more lighthearted and enjoyable.   If you’ve decided to stay married and have been working through the recovery process, have you considered renewing your marriage vows?    Today we're going to explore the "why" behind renewing your vows, why we decided to renew our vows and unpack what renewing your marriage vows signifies as you move forward in your relationship.   So, grab your coffee or wine and get ready for a fun discussion that we hope brings you encouragement in your own healing journey.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   Hey y’all! Please send us a voice review, ask a question, or make a comment on SpeakPipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/BeyondBrokenVows   Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! https://insider.beyondbrokenvows.com   Book a complimentary call with us here: https://calendly.com/support-bbv/discovery-call     Resources: Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                           Related Episodes: Episode 04. Sharing Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 05. The Effects of Infidelity and How We Made the Decision to Stay Married After Sexual Betrayal     Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.       Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Hello Friend,   Have you wrestled with this question? Can there still be a meaningful sexual relationship after experiencing sexual betrayal? The short answer is YES, but today, we're not diving into the world of makeup or guilt sex. Instead, we'll be delving into the realm of true intimacy.   Intimacy is often misunderstood as just being synonymous with love and sex. While sex is a part of it, there's a deeper layer involved. It's about gradually building a connection with your spouse, one that's rooted in honesty, vulnerability, and transparency. So, join us as we explore the intricacies of maintaining a strong bond through intimacy.   So, reheat your coffee or pour yourself a glass of wine and join us for an encouraging look at sex and intimacy in marriage after sexual betrayal.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   Hey y’all! Please send us a voice review, ask a question, or make a comment on SpeakPipe. It's easy! https://www.speakpipe.com/BeyondBrokenVows     Resources: Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                           Related Episodes: Episode 06. Setting Boundaries After Sexual Betrayal in Marriage Episode 07. 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 1) Episode 08. 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 2) Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 11. Freedom and Healing: 4 Keys to Unlocking Forgiveness After Sexual Betrayal Episode 13. His Triggers, Her Triggers – 4 Steps For Dealing With Triggers While Healing From Infidelity   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Hello Friend,   Have you experienced grief? We normally associate grief with the death and loss of someone we love, and we can also grieve the loss of something we are emotionally attached to like a job or home. But there is also a loss that occurs through betrayal. With this type of loss come the very same emotions that are common to losing someone or something dear to us.   After sexual betrayal, the loss of the relationship you thought you had can trigger the grieving process. Finding out about your spouse's hidden sexual behavior can be one of the most shocking betrayals you'll ever go through and the experience of being lied to and manipulated compounds the trauma and can even intensify grief. Grief in any situation is very painful and takes time and courage to process through.   So, grab your coffee or pumpkin spiced latte and join us as we look at grief through the lens of sexual betrayal in marriage.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     Resources:   Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                          Related Episodes: Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 05. The Effects of Infidelity and How We Made the Decision to Stay Married After Sexual Betrayal Check out our videos on YouTube! @beyondbrokenvows     Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com       Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

The prevalence of sexually explicit content continues to surge, becoming increasingly accessible with each passing day. Who's it hurting? A better question might be, who isn't it hurting? Pornography affects everyone from innocent children to grandparents and there’s really no escaping it in our culture today. So, what can we do?   Today we are sharing a discussion we had with a young couple who experienced the devastation of pornography use in their marriage. But, they didn’t let it destroy them. In fact, they are doing something amazing to help others struggling with porn addiction find freedom. Their secret to success might just surprise you!   It's time to sip on your favorite drink and join us for a captivating conversation featuring our guests, Emmanuel and Bekah Guarino.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     RESOURCES MENTIONED: Teamvulnerable.com Youtube: Team Vulnerable Instagram: teamvulnerable   Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                                 RELATED EPISODES: Episode 16. “It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing Pornography Episode 17. ” Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior  Episode 18. Feeling Like I’m Not Enough. What If Pornography Is Not My True Addiction? Episode 20. From Porn Queen To Child of God Now On Mission To Help Others Find Freedom with Elizabeth Spraggins     Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com       Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Hey Friend,   Have you ever been curious about the untold stories of those in the adult entertainment industry? Do you question the authenticity of what you've heard about or witnessed on the screen?   We've recently been talking a lot about the harmful impact of pornography on consumers and their loved ones, but only briefly explored the profound effects it has on those who take center stage.   Today, prepare to be captivated as we engage in a compelling conversation with Elizabeth Spraggins, a remarkable individual who once lived in the world of adult entertainment but has since found freedom in Christ. Elizabeth, a Certified Professional Life Coach and a distinguished authority in human sexuality and adult entertainment, offers us an exclusive glimpse behind the curtains.   She's not only turned her life around but has also extended her hand to those still navigating this complex industry. Join us as Elizabeth unveils the transformation ignited by her newfound relationship with Jesus and her inspiring mission to guide adult entertainers and sex workers toward a path of rebirth—mind, body, and spirit.   Grab your coffee or pumpkin spiced latte and tune in for an eye-opening discussion that'll change the way you see the world behind the screen.   We pray this blesses you!   Johnny and Emily   Here's how you can connect with Elizabeth, Podcast: Digging From Darkness Living in Light, on multiple platforms @elizabethspraggins on YouTube @alljoyinspired on Twitch, Rumble, Twitter   To watch this interview on YouTube click here, https://youtu.be/N2FbjR57ApI   Resources: Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                   Related Episodes: Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 16. “It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing  Pornography Episode 17. ” Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior Episode 18. Feeling Like I’m Not Enough. What If Pornography Is Not My True Addiction?   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com     Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

As a fallen human race, we tend to compare ourselves to others in many ways, the way people look, what kind of clothes they wear or car they drive, what job they have or what kind of house and neighborhood they live in. This comparison can lead to feelings of inadequacy or pridefulness.  I imagine most, if not all of us, have or have had some degree of comparison working against us in how we feel about ourselves.   Today we are going to explore the feeling of not being enough and how the destructive practice of comparison shaped my view of my self-worth before the discovery of my husband’s sexual betrayal and then after it all came to light and how it slowly eroded my personal identity throughout my life. So, grab your favorite beverage, buckle up and get ready for some real transparency.   We pray this blesses you,   Emily and Johnny Spigelmire   Resources:   Covenant Eyes – covenanteyes.sjv.io/bbv Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                       Related Episodes: Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 18. Feeling Like I’m Not Enough. What If Pornography Is Not My True Addiction?   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com      Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

In our marriages when there is sexual betrayal fueled by pornography use or addiction, it is easy to only focus on the outward behaviors because they are so painful and destructive. But what if there is something deeper under the surface that you are unaware of? What if the addiction was only the evidence of an underlying problem.  Would you be willing to explore the possibility?   I’m a recovering sex addict with over 4 years of sobriety and I’m grateful that I discovered that there was something insidious behind my acting out behaviors. This realization became the framework on which my recovery began.   Today we are going to unpack my ah-ha moment and uncover the deeper origins that led to my true addiction, which had manifested as porn addiction and ultimately culminated into extra-marital relationships.    So, grab your favorite beverage and join us for this eye-opening discussion about what may be behind our addictive and destructive behaviors.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily                        Related Episodes: Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 16. “It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing Pornography Episode 17. ” Is My Spouse A Porn Addict? 13 Clues To Help Expose Compulsive Sexual Behavior   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question or comment for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com        Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

As the wife of a recovering addict, I’ve learned that there were clues displayed by my husband that pointed to addictive behavior. I was aware of his periodic pornography use but didn’t put it together with these behavioral clues to realize that there might be a serious issue. Now that we have been working on our recovery for several years, I have discovered what I either missed or ignored as signs of a porn addiction.  We are going to share some information with you today that I wished I had known before it had escalated into compulsive pornography use and serial extra-marital relationships.   We hope this information helps you connect the dots. This is not about getting our spouses into trouble; it’s about getting them out. Freedom is on the other side of hidden sin. Even if you are already aware of addictive behavioral patterns, please be assured that it will not just go away on its own. If left unaddressed, it will always escalate. It is a painful process to come out of addiction, for both spouses, but it is well worth the journey to experience real connection with each other in a marriage based on honesty, trust, transparency, and exclusivity.   So, grab your favorite beverage, get comfy and spend some time with us as we unpack 13 clues that may expose porn/sex addiction in your spouse or yourself so that healing can begin.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     CORRECTION: The scripture reference of Proverbs 27:17 was incorrect. Here is the verse with the correct reference; And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:24   Resources mentioned:             Out of the Shadows – Patrick Carnes             LPC; CSAT; Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA- 12-Step); Celebrate Recovery             Related Episodes: Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 07. 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 1) Episode 08. 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 2) Episode 16. “It’s Just Porn, What’s The Big Deal?” And 4 Other Lies We Tell Ourselves To Justify Viewing Pornography   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com       Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

If pornography is no big deal, why are so many marriages destroyed by it? If pornography is harmless, why are so many people around the world hurt by it? If pornography is no big deal, why do we hide it from our wives? If pornography is harmless, why do we hide it from our children?   How much do you know about porn and the pornography industry? I didn’t know much about it when I got married and I didn’t really want to. I thought it was something non-believers did. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to stay naive about this topic when my husband revealed to me his pornography use that escalated into extra-marital relationships. I got an education that I never wanted, but it has helped me to be more discerning and also empathetic to those who struggle with this destructive habitual sin.   Today we will unpack 4 lies that people tell themselves when trying to justify the use of pornography and also just how harmful it is inside of covenant marriage.    We hope this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     Resources mentioned:   Exodus Cry - Fighting human sex trafficking globally. Know the Facts. Join the Movement. Give to the Cause. https://exoduscry.com/                            Related Episodes: Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com       Disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is provided solely for educational purposes and should be considered as general information. It is not intended to serve as therapy or psychological advice. We strongly recommend consulting your physician or mental health provider for personalized advice, support, or treatment concerning your well-being. In the event of a crisis, please dial 911 for immediate assistance.

Have you ever told someone something you knew they were not going to want to hear? Do you have something you need to tell someone and are terrified about how they will react? Are you afraid to say it because it could cause them significant pain and/or jeopardize your relationship with them? These are very natural emotions that come with telling difficult news. This was our predicament when we made the decision to tell some people about the reality of infidelity in our marriage.   Today we will share with you how we went through this process and what happened as a result.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     Resources mentioned:            The Healing Apology (request .pdf at support@beyondbrokenvows.com)                        Related Episodes: Episode 01. ”Why Are We Talking About Betrayal?” A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery Episode 14. To Tell Or Not To Tell: 3 Things We Did Right (And 1 Thing We Didn’t) When Deciding Who Needs To Know Our Infidelity Story   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Your marriage has suffered a massive blow of betrayal. Adultery through pornography and/or extra-marital relationships has been discovered. You both want to save the marriage, if possible, by working on reconciliation and recovery. But now you’re wondering if you need to tell anyone or if you should just keep it private and work on it together.     We went through this same scenario and today we are going to let you peek inside our marriage and the devastation we experienced through infidelity to see the process we went through when trying to decide, To Tell or Not To Tell. That IS the question. For today. 😉   So, grab a yummy beverage, get comfortable and listen in as we take a trip down memory lane, just 4 ½ short years ago, and walk you through the things we did right (and one thing we didn’t) when making the decision to tell or not to tell.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   Resources mentioned:  The Healing Apology (request .pdf at support@beyondbrokenvows.com)   Related Episodes: Episode 01. ”Why Are We Talking About Betrayal?” A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values Episode 04. Our Story: From Infidelity and Addiction to Reconciliation and Recovery   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny and/or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Triggers, what are they and how do they affect us? Triggers come without warning and without our permission. Today we’re going to dissect the ways we are triggered and how we should handle them, so they are not destructive, but rather an opportunity for healing, connection and growth. And good heavens, do they ever stop?   Grab your favorite beverage and buckle up as we talk about triggers.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   Resources mentioned:The Healing Apology (request .pdf at support@beyondbrokenvows.com) The Second Coming Tattoo Parlor, Fort Worth, Texas - ask for Felipe  Related Episodes: Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 12. His Adultery Shattered My Reality. How Do I Know What’s Real?   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

What actually happens to a person who has experienced betrayal? What happens in the mind of one who has their reality shattered in an instant?   Today we’re going to be discussing the effects of this type of mental and emotional injury when someone is betrayed. We’ll be sharing with you how this affected us after Johnny’s confession of adultery through pornography use and extra-marital relationships and how we sorted through the reality that our marriage was not what Emily thought it was. We’ll also share what we did to sift through the wreckage and find the nuggets of truth which then helped us to start building our new, more honest and beautiful, reality together.   So, grab your favorite beverage and spend some time with us as we have a conversation about what is real and not real.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: The Healing Apology (request .pdf at support@beyondbrokenvows.com) The Aftermath of Betrayal by Michelle D. Mays LPC, CSAT-S Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)              RELATED EPISODES: Episode 8. I’m So Angry! How I Overcome Anger from Sexual Betrayal in 3 Simple But Not Easy Steps Episode 10. When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough: 8 Steps to a Healing Apology Episode 11. Freedom and Healing: 4 Keys to Unlocking Forgiveness After Sexual Betrayal   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question or comment for Johnny or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Do you find it hard to forgive someone who has hurt you deeply?   On our show today, we’re going to unpack 4 keys to unlocking forgiveness. This method is simple, but it’s definitely not easy. So how do we get through this difficult process? We will share with you how this approach played out in our marriage after porn-fueled infidelity and where we turned for help.   Grab your favorite beverage and spend some time with us as we delve deeper into the topic of forgiveness.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)   Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com     D

Do you appreciate getting an apology? Do you have a hard time extending one? Do you even know what a good apology looks like?   Join us today as we cover the 8 steps to a healing apology, which is so helpful in a marriage, especially when there has been some form of betrayal.   We have experienced the power of this healing apology in our own marriage after the discovery and disclosure of pornography use that escalated into infidelity. Giving an apology the wrong way can be even more hurtful than not doing it at all. But, done correctly, it can open the door to forgiveness, healing and hope.   So, grab something to take notes with and your favorite beverage and listen in for a step-by-step process to an amazing healing apology.   We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily       💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Center for Relational Care (CRC)             Austin/Dallas 512.492.6200    Atlanta 678.653.3272 Gary Smalley, Hidden Keys to Loving Relationships (Drive-Through Talking) How We Love by Milan and Kay Yerkovich Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases..)                         Next Steps:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Do you get angry while driving in traffic? Have you ever had or seen road rage? Are you the person that yells at everyone making stupid and even dangerous driving mistakes from inside your car with the windows up?     I can’t say I’ve never had a burst of anger when driving, but in recent years I have made it a practice to try and give other drivers the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they have an emergency, maybe their kids are distracting them... And it also helps to remind myself that I have probably done the same stupid thing before myself and that I’m not the only one with important places to go. But, this isn’t the kind of anger we’re going to talk about today.     Anger can be a catalyst to create needed changes or to promote justice, but it can also become disastrous if not contained within some specific boundaries. Today we are going to talk about the good, the bad and the ugly aspects of anger and how to move through it so we are not trapped in this potentially destructive emotion.     We all struggle with anger at times, but we don't have to let it rule the day. So, grab your favorite beverage and stick around as we have an honest  conversation about Emily's anger caused by Johnny's betrayal and how she learned to overcome it with 3 simple (but not easy) steps.     We pray this blesses you,     Johnny and Emily       💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) How We Love by Milan and Kay Yerkovich The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman   (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     D

When you think of the word honesty, do you view it in black and white or on a sliding scale?   Those who see it in black and white might argue that a person either tells the truth or they don’t. Those who prefer a sliding scale approach may categorize white lies at a 1-2, lies of omission at a 4-5, but a deceptive or premeditated lie at 9-10. Honesty, in this person’s mind, is relative.     In our show today, we’re going to talk about rigorous honesty. We were first introduced to this concept through Johnny’s 12-step program. We will unpack what this kind of honesty looks like, how to attain it and how it impacted our recovery process. We will also take a look at what God says about honesty from the scriptures.     So get comfy and settle in for part 2 of our lively discussion on 5 ways we lie and the secret to complete honesty. And just a reminder that we’d love to answer any questions you have about our journey or yours!     We pray this blesses you,     Johnny and Emily       💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.) Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)   RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values Episode 07. 5 Ways We Lie and the Secret to Complete Honesty (part 1)   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review.     ✔️If you have a question for Johnny or Emily, you can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com

Did you know that there is more than one way to lie?       A lack of honesty can leave others in your life on uncertain ground. How do we overcome this deceptive practice and what is the key to complete honesty?     Spend the next half hour with us as we talk about 5 different ways we lie to each other, how lying affects our relationships and what we can do to change it forever.     We will also be sharing some details from our sometimes painful journey to find freedom from the lies that plagued our marriage.     We hope this blesses you!     Johnny and Emily       💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.) Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Have you ever stopped to think about the significance of boundaries? What kind of feelings or emotions do you think of when you hear that term? Does it bring to mind negative connotations or a sense of being confined and restricted? Perhaps it even feels punitive or unfair. It's understandable to have these reactions, but let's take a moment to consider a different perspective. What if boundaries could actually be beneficial for all parties involved?   In today's episode, we're going to unpack the word "boundaries". We'll explore why boundaries are not only necessary but essential in our lives. We'll examine what insights and guidance we can find from a spiritual standpoint, exploring what God has to say about boundaries.   But our exploration won't stop there. We'll also share a personal story, drawing from our own experiences in marriage. When faced with the challenges of infidelity and addiction, we had to confront the need for boundaries head-on. We'll walk you through our journey of how we implemented and navigated these often misunderstood boundaries in our relationship.   So, make sure to stick around and listen in. By the end of this episode, you'll gain a deeper understanding of boundaries and their potential to bring about positive transformation in your own life and relationships.   We pray this blesses you!   Johnny and Emily 💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES:  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

The decision to stay married after sexual betrayal is a very difficult one to navigate. We understand this because the effects of infidelity shook each of us to our core. If you've been listening to our show you know we are still married, but we didn’t go through this on our own. We had an incredible amount of support and guidance along the way.   In this episode we're going to open up about the personal effects that infidelity had on each of us while shedding light on the reasons behind our mutual decision to preserve our marriage, despite the pain.   We also have a list of valuable resources to share with you—ones that truly made a difference as we navigated our new reality. But the most important thing we want to leave you with is the hope of redemption and the grace, mercy, and love of our amazing God!   So grab your favorite beverage, get comfortable and get ready for a story of resilience and faith.    We pray this episode blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases at no additional cost to you.) Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only) Centers for Relational Care (CRC) - 5 day marriage intensive The Aftermath of Betrayal by Michelle Dr. Mays LPC, CSAT-S Gary Smalley - Hidden Keys to Loving Relationships  Proverbs 15:22 Numbers 6:24-26 (The Priestly Blessing)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     D

Hi Friend,    In today's episode we will be telling a quick version of our love story from how we met and got married up to the day of Johnny's confession of adultery that we call Discovery Day.   If you haven't heard our story as told by each of us from our own perspectives, you can listen to Emily's story in Episode 2 and Johnny's story in Episode 3.   We are telling our story together today to help you understand that we are ordinary people who love Jesus, but how the Enemy was able to wreak havoc in our lives. We also share the hope of redemption and the grace, mercy and love of our amazing God!    We pray this episode blesses you!   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post may contain affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me Episode 03. His Story: I Betrayed My Wife and My Moral Values   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.   .

Hi Friend,   On today's episode, Johnny tells his story of how a young boy with hopes and dreams for a wonderful future ends up confessing to his wife of 31 years that he is a sex addict and an adulterer. His painful story is tragic, but also beautiful because he knows the One who makes a way when there is no way. Jesus can make something beautiful out of the ashes of our lives if we let him.    We pray this episode blesses you!   Johnny and Emily   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post contains affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         RELATED EPISODES: Episode 01. Why Are We Talking About Betrayal? A Q&A with the Betrayed and the Betrayer Episode 02. Her Story: My Husband Betrayed Me   NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Hi Friend,   Today Emily is baring her soul to tell the story of her husband's marital infidelity fueled by pornography use. And although it was Not Her Fault in any way, she is not perfect and you will hear some of the ways she fell short in her life too. But, God is bigger than any failure, heartbreak or trauma. He is the redeemer of the lost and the comforter of the broken-hearted.    We pray this episode blesses you!   Emily and Johnny   💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post contains affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show!     ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️ You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.     *Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals.

Hello Friends!   This is our very first show on the Beyond Broken Vows podcast. Today we are telling you a little bit about us, what you will hear in this podcast, what you won't hear in this podcast, and our goal for sharing our personal story with you. Topics like betrayal, infidelity, and pornography addiction are difficult for many people to talk about, especially for those being affected in some way by them. We have definitely been through all of these, but we are also enjoying the blessings of reconciliation, redemption and recovery. With God it is possible!    Are you someone who has been betrayed by your spouse? Or have you betrayed your spouse? Then this show is for you. We don't have all the answers, but we know the One who does. Please let us share our hearts with you and give you hope for your marriage.  We pray this blesses you,   Johnny and Emily     💜Work with us! Beyond Betrayal Breakthrough Coaching coaching.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Become a Beyond Broken Vows Insider! Receive our weekly newsletter with behind-the-scenes stories, marriage tips, podcast previews and early access to giveaways and promotions! insider.beyondbrokenvows.com 💜Send us a voice message on SpeakPipe   RESOURCES: (This post contains affiliate links to products. We earn a commission from qualifying purchases.)  Covenant Eyes Use promo Code BBV to get 30 days free! (website purchase only)                         NEXT STEPS:     ✔️FOLLOW so you don’t miss a show! ✔️Leave a 5-star rating & written review on Apple Podcast. ✔️You can connect with us at support@beyondbrokenvows.com.

Have you been devastated by marital infidelity fueled by pornography? We've been there too and have traveled a difficult yet victorious road to reconciliation and recovery. We believe that any couple who is willing to completely surrender to God can not only get through it but also experience a marriage made new and better than ever before!   Listen on YouTube https://youtu.be/qH9y_fIZ6zw