Awesome Marriage Podcast

Today in Part 2 of Kathy’s story, Kathy shares the ways she sought support from the church when she realized her marriage was in trouble, the responses she received, and the effects that had on her marriage. In this episode Kathy shares why it’s not possible for the abused spouse to end the abuse, and the difference between biblical versus unbiblical advice about abuse. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

 Interventions the church put in place, and why they were not successful 

The wake up moment that turned things around for Kathy 

What is an appropriate response to spousal abuse? 

The red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical 

They won’t call out that abuse is abuse

They will not call the abuse sin

The safety of the abused spouse is not top priority 

There is no call for repentance 

They advise you to stay, regardless 

Blaming the abused for the abuse

QUOTES

“There is one person responsible for abuse: It is the abuser.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

“The Bible definitely commands forgiveness. It does not command reconciliation.”  - Kathy McAtee Young 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline : 800-799-7233 https://www.thehotline.org/

Visit Kathy’s website to learn about the helpful resources and services she offers 

Kathy can also be reached for coaching on Instagram 

This previous episode explains a Biblical perspective on abuse

Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser with Dr. David E Clarke | Ep. 541 

When does an unhealthy marriage become an abusive marriage? Where can you go when you need to get out? In today’s episode we hear part 1 of Kathy’s real marriage story. Kathy shares how she came to believe that divorce was the most God-honoring option in her situation, and how she found safety after 30+ years in an emotionally abusive marriage. 

We are so grateful to Kathy for generously sharing her story. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Dispelling myths about who falls into abuse 

Why marriage counseling does not work in abusive marriages

How Kathy learned her marriage was abusive

Why she stayed as long as she did, and why she later divorced  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

This previous episode defines a clear Biblical perspective on abuse:

Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser with Dr. David E Clarke | Ep. 541 

QUOTES

“I want to debunk the myth that abused women are poorly educated, lower income, women who can easily be taken advantage of. That’s just not accurate.”  - Kathy McAtee Young 

“Within the first year, I knew we had trouble…” - Kathy McAtee Young  

“Marriage counseling does not work if there’s abuse involved. I know that now.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

“Most people who are narcissists are really good at it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“You have this idea that, ‘If she could fix all these things, then I wouldn’t be this way.’ That’s the blame shifting.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

“The heart of abuse is power and control. Everything else is tactics.” - Kathy McAtee Young 

Do you fight fair, or do you wish there was a referee to call a stop to the foul play when you argue with your spouse? Ground rules are an important step toward having healthy marriage conflict, so today Dr. Kim will spell out how to make sure you’re fighting fair in your marriage. We want to empower you to fight fair, and resolve issues in a kind and loving way. 

If you need help to fight fair and truly resolve issues without making things worse, you will love today’s conversation. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

The DOs and DON’Ts of fighting fair 

The side effects of unhealthy conflict 

A healthy way to “let it all out” 

Can honesty go too far?  How do you know? 

Tips to the reconnection process - how to make up well 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“We both learned we needed to reconnect and apologize, but sometimes we werent’ ready to take that step at the same time. We had to learn that somebody needs to take the step. It doesn’t really matter who started the fight or who was wrong.” 

“Taking responsibility is huge. Owning your part in it, even if you think you only did 10%, you still did 10%.”

“What are you sorry for? Be very specific in what you did and why you're taking responsibility.”

“I say it a lot: One of the best gifts you can give your marriage is to learn how to resolve conflict.” 

Forgiveness and apologies need to have no strings attached. It’s just that I choose to do this. 

We’re not just trying to clear a slate so our spouse stops bugging us. Have you repented before the Lord? That’s where this starts. 

We are accountable to Him before being accountable to our spouse. Did I just treat my spouse in the way He would have me treat them? If not, I need to take that up with Him 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

When you really think about it, how did it affect your spouse when you had this conflict? 

Repentance. Learning from the mistakes made and committing to work on them together. 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar 

Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is your quick guide to get marriage conflict on the right track. 

If you’re ready to learn how to do conflict well, the Conflict Resolution Guide helps you diagnose the problem areas in your marriage, then learn the steps to resolve them. 

TODAY is the last day for our 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle! Don’t miss the chance to get 7 of our most-loved resources for 1 donation of ANY amount in support of the ministry of Awesome Marriage! Get all the details here!  

Sick of the same old fights over and over with your spouse? Learn to de-escalate marriage fights and resolve issues in a healthy and helpful way. Conflict in marriage is inevitable, but the way you handle it is what matters most. Learning to deal with it well will benefit your marriage in so many ways! Tune in today to learn how. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Common conflict pitfalls to avoid

The problem with “winning” marriage fights 

Tips to help you break the fighting cycle

What to do if one spouse is not ready to reconnect 

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

Are you stuck in a conflict cycle? If so, work together to identify what’s triggering it. 

Choose 1 tip from Dr. Kim’s list below that you will both agree to use this week. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“When we try our best to avoid conflict, we’re not really equipping ourselves with the skills to handle it well.” - Lindsay Few 

“Awareness gives you some insight that can really be useful.” Dr. Kim Kimberling 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar 

Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is your quick guide to get marriage conflict on the right track. 

If you’re ready to learn how to do conflict well, the Conflict Resolution Guide helps you diagnose the problem areas in your marriage, then learn the steps to resolve them. 

It’s here! Our 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle is LIVE! That means you can get 7 of our most-loved marriage building resources by making 1 donation of ANY amount to support the ministry of Awesome Marriage! The bundle is available for a limited time only. Get all the details here!  

Learn how conflict can create a deeper connection between you and your spouse. Today’s special guest, marriage coach Dana Che is very open about the struggles her marriage faced. In today’s episode she shares her marriage story, what got them through, and how you can use the conflict you face in marriage to draw you toward deeper connection. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

What we can learn from our conflict triggers

How to deal with different conflict styles in marriage 

Steps to break generational cycles in your marriage 

The power of speaking life to our spouse and our marriage 

How being emotionally unavailable tends to show up in husbands and in wives & what to do about it  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“As a wife, I knew I couldn’t change my husband … but that didn’’ keep me from trying.” Dana Che 

“When you actually engage in conflict, you can start to learn more about your spouse, what’s important to them.” -Dana Che 

 “You’ve got to feed the right things if you want to change the wrong things.” - Dana Che 

“Just like you learned that bad behavior, you can unlearn it and learn something new.” Dana Che 

“True repentance is visible.” Dana Che 

“What we believe, we will begin to speak. What we speak, we will begin to behave.” Dana Che

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

What does your most recent marriage conflict reveal about what’s most valuable to you?  

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find more from Dana at DanaChe.com, where you can take her “Connection Check” quiz 

Listen to the “Real Relationship Talk” podcast 

Joining Marriage Changers now means you score a huge haul of marriage-building goods when our annual *7 Most-Popular Resource Bundle* goes live on April 2nd! 

Why do Christians need counseling? Isn’t the Gospel enough to transform us? We hear these questions fairly often. Today Dr. Kim and special guest Jason VanRuler dive deeper into these questions and the conversation about the role of therapy and counseling in a life devoted to following Jesus.

Don’t miss this helpful conversation! We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

How often do clients have no idea that they haven’t gotten past their past? 

Unexpected ways your past might be showing up & affecting your marriage today

Updating the negative messages we believe about ourselves 

The effect of vulnerability on our marriage connection 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Where there's a disconnect in relationships, it’s often a disconnect from the system we witnessed growing up and what we’re trying to make happen today.” - Jason VanRuler 

“When we get comfortable, the old ways seep out to the surface.”  - Jason VanRuler 

“Every time a client says a negative message about themselves, I ask, is that the message you think God gave you?”  - Jason VanRuler 

“One of my great joys is working with people to eliminate distractions so they can focus on the truth and live the life God has called them to.”- Jason VanRuler 

“If we want to feel connected and we’re not feeling connected, a lot of times that emotional intimacy and depth is the missing link.”  - Jason VanRuler 

“When we get vulnerable and honest, it attracts intimacy from our partner and we have a different relationship.”  - Jason VanRuler 

“The marriage we want is often on the other side of vulnerability. We just don’t often know how to get there.”- Jason VanRuler

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

 Do you recognize any ways you haven’t gotten past your past? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Get Jason’s book, Get Past Your Past 

His site: https://www.jasonvr.com/

If you’re ready to heal your marriage from p*rn, join us for the “5 Steps to Healing After P*rn Betrayal” LIVE webinar.

Are you a man living in the stress bubble? It’s when the years of marriage, career building and raising kids all happen at once. You’re figuring everything out, trying to be there for it all, and it. Is. Stressful. If you’re there, you want to hear from a godly dad who has been there. 

We’re so happy to share this conversation with Jim Ramos. Jim’s wisdom and experience will equip and encourage you to be the husband and dad you want to be. Don’t miss this episode.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Jim defines the 4 phases of fatherhood 

Advice for the dad who never had a role model to guide him

Common mistakes dads make in the “stress bubble” years 

Types of provision that the family needs from a husband / father

3 easy things Jim did that he recommends for all couples 

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Whether we tell our kids that we’ve made mistakes or not, they’re still noticing. Especially during those teen years.” - Jim Ramos

"Our families require much more than physical provision. The damage most men do has nothing to do with physical provision; it has to do with heart care and soul care.” Jim Ramos

“You don’t have to be flashy. You don't have to be Superman. You just have to show up.”   - Jim Ramos 

“As men we have to realize our wife is the most important person on the planet, and it’s our job to make one person feel special.”  - Jim Ramos 

“You will not be remembered for what you did 9-5, you will be remembered for what you did 5-9.”  - Jim Ramos 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

Jim shared 5 traits that set a “man” apart from a “male”:

Protect integrity Fight apathy  Pursue God passionately Lead courageously Finish strong each day 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find Jim online @ https://meninthearena.org/

On instagram @themeninthearena

Get the book Strong Men Dangerous Times

Listen to the Men in The Arena Podcast 

Dr. Kim has said that prayer is the #1 most impactful thing you can do for your marriage. Today he explains why that is, and how to make it a habit in your marriage. Today we want to make praying with your spouse more approachable by sharing 4 biblical prayers to pray with your spouse that will grow your marriage. 

The Bible lists a lot of reasons for marriage, and praying in line with God’s purpose and intention for marriage is very powerful. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Why prayer is an essential act of spiritual protection against the enemy 

Why it’s so hard to get started, and how to overcome 

Healthy perspective shifts praying will provide in your marriage 

How to handle some of the uncomfortable realities of answered prayers 

The power of prayer to help you take personal responsibility

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Praying together puts God where he wants to be in our marriage: Right in the center of it. - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“The enemy does not want Christian marriages to work.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“When you pray together you find that it unites you.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“There’s a ripple effect: It’s not just about the couple, it’s about the family; it’s about the community.” - Lindsay Few 

“I am more of who God created me to be after being married to Nancy all these years than I would have been without her.” -  Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“God put us together. He’s got some fun stuff for us to do. Let’s look out and let’s get this stuff going!” - Lindsay Few

Blame is a very human response…but we all have a way we can influence the world. We do have control over how we’re responding to God’s call on us.” - Lindsay Few

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

4 Prayers to Pray together: 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Our 21 Prayers for Building An Awesome Marriage makes it simple to make prayer a regular part of your marriage <3 

Find more prayers to grow your marriage in the 7 Prayers YouVersion Bible reading plan 

When we pray, it can be tempting to make our prayers a wishlist. But praying in line with God’s word changes things, and today we’re talking about why that matters and how to pray biblically for your marriage. Today Dr. Kim shares 4 prayers that line up with Scripture that you can be praying daily to grow you, and your marriage! 

Don’t miss this powerful episode. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Why it matters to pray biblically

What makes a prayer biblical

The risk involved in praying these things, and the reward they provide

How these prayers have impacted Dr. Kim and Nancy’s marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

We’ve probably all heard some things taught, or caught, that were not biblical. We’ve heard ideas like, 'If God loves you, He’ll make you happy,' or 'If you marry the right person, marriage will be easy,' that do not line up with Scripture.”- Lindsay Few 

“Trusting him may be the hardest first step for some of us, because we’re not sure what he’ll do.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“Sometimes the prayer we want answered is just the thing that’s easiest for us.” - Lindsay Few 

“He’s always good, even though we don’t see it at times.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“Each of us can be thankful that God knows not only what’s best for us, but for the whole world. We don’t have to be burdened with that. He’s got that.” - Lindsay Few 

“If you’re lining up with what God states in his word that He wants to have happen, that’s going to be really powerful.” - Lindsay Few 

“We can’t hide anything from God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“Sexual desire is created for a reason. It’s not a secret from God.” - Lindsay Few 

4 Prayers to Grow You and Your Marriage: 

Pray that God will help you love like Christ loved. 

Ask God to search you, know your heart, and reveal any offensive way.

Pray that your desire will be for your spouse only. 

Ask God to help you see your spouse as He does. 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Make prayer a regular part of your marriage with our 21 Prayers for Building An Awesome Marriage 

If your marriage is struggling to recover after infidelity, please check out our Affair Recovery Course. For less than the cost of 2 counseling sessions, this course helps you learn and take the needed steps to healing. 

If porn has damaged your marriage, please take advantage of these resources we’ve created just for you: 

The Marriage Undefiled Course

Dr. Kim’s podcast episode with Matt Cline 

Find more prayers to grow your marriage in the 7 Prayers YouVersion Bible reading  plan 

What does it look like to live in intimacy with God each day? We are delighted to have Faith Eury Cho with us today, sharing about what friendship with God means, even in the “wilderness” times in our lives. 

Faith is the CEO and founder of the Honor Summit, a gospel preacher, and author of the new book, Experiencing Friendship with God: How the Wilderness Draws Us to His Presence. Faith does a great job de-mystifying this lofty topic, so you don’t want to miss this conversation. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

What does “friendship with God” actually mean? 

Practical ways to “practice God’s presence,” even if it seems out of reach 

How friendship with God impacts marriage

How to grow spiritually with your spouse

Ways to take these concepts into parenting / grandparenting 

How to navigate the wilderness seasons of our faith 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Sometimes without even knowing, we believe so that God can give us a better life.” - Faith Eury Cho

“Friendship with God is just intimacy on a day to day level.” Faith Eury Cho

“We need to really redefine what experience actually means. Because if we go into any relationship, any - our spouse, our kids, our friends - having a set agenda of what experiencing that relationship should look like to us, it can be very unhealthy really quick.” -  Faith Eury Cho

“Start simple. Start with something that is a natural offshoot to your regular rhythms of life.”  - Faith Eury Cho

“I remember moments I would tell God, ‘I don’t have a prayer to pray, I don’t have a song to sing, but I’m here.’”  - Faith Eury Cho

“God cares about every little thing, and we want to give him the opportunity to show us that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“Some of us are friends with fear, not the presence of God, and I think we’ve got to break up with our fear!” - Faith Eury Cho

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

What is one way you and your spouse like to worship God together? 

Have you seen God move during a ‘wilderness’ season? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find Faith on Instagram or at her website, www.faitheurycho.com

Grab Faith’s book, Experiencing Friendship with God: How the Wilderness Draws Us to His Presence.

Our 2 Week Couples Scripture Challenge is a practical tool to help you get in the Word with your spouse each day. Find out more here!  

Our House Prayer Cards are one of our best-loved resources, making it simple to use mundane moments for godly purpose in your home. Learn more HERE!

If you’d like to get each of our monthly marriage resources delivered directly to your inbox, while also supporting the non-profit ministry of Awesome Marriage, it’s time to become a Marriage Changer! Get all the details here.

How’s the romance in your marriage? How does it compare to when you were dating? (… and does that matter?)

Romance can fall by the wayside in marriage because it seems like an “extra” that you’ll get around to when you have extra time or money, or if you feel inspired to make a grand gesture. 

But today Dr. Kim shares several reasons NOT to let that be the case in your marriage. Listen to learn why you need to bring the romance back and HOW to realistically make that happen. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Dr. Kim shares specific ways romance benefits a marriage 

What does romance look like for men vs. for women? 

What to do if you’re just not feeling it 

Whose job is it to make sure the romance is good?  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Most people would say at some point it was there. So how do you get it back?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“We kind of quit doing romantic things because we’re not feeling it. Sometimes we have to go ahead and do them, so that we feel it again.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“Marriage is a lot better when you’ve got romance in it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“I think we’d like it to come naturally, like it does in the movies 

“It’s ok to have the conversation. We have to get past the mindset of, ‘If you really loved me, you’d know.’” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“Romance is a great way to show your spouse, I see you, I appreciate you, and I care about what you care about.” Lindsay Few 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

 Have you talked about romance with your spouse? 

Ask them: What is sexy to you? What is romantic to you? 

Don’t judge their answers! 

Answers may change over time, so check in every now and then. 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

- The ❤️‍🔥Sexy Bundle❤️‍helps bring the romance riiight on home! Get all the details about this limited time Bundle HERE!

Whether you love it or hate it, you spend the majority of your waking hours doing it. And as today’s guest tells us, it’s mentioned over 800 times in the Bible: We’re talking about work.  

That’s why we’re so pleased to have Jordan Raynor join us on the podcast today to talk about how your work matters to God - today, every day of your life, and for eternity. This conversation will leave you inspired and encouraged to engage well with the word God is calling you to do, every single day. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

3 ways your everyday work matters for eternity 

Why Jordan advocates for making an “Anti-Bucket List”

The Biblical truths of Heaven & Eternity that NO ONE is talking about 

The “abridged Gospel” that most of us believe & the implications we miss if we do 

The practical ways these deep biblical truths will impact your marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“When we understand what God’s word has to say about work, it frees us up to be exceptional both at work and at home.” - Jordan Raynor 

“While God’s word is clear that our labor in the Lord is not in vain, it also makes clear that GOd doesn’t need you or me - His purposes will not be thwarted. He does not need us, he wants us.” - Jordan Raynor  

“I can be at peace walking away from my work at the end of the day … because I know that if the things on my to - do list are on God’s to - do list, he’s going to complete them with or without me. That’s terrifically freeing.” - Jordan Raynor  

“Scripture mentions work more than 800 times. There’s no need to doubt whether or not God cares about your work.” - Jordan Raynor 

“When you understand that 100% of your time at home and at work matters to God, you become fully alive. And this world is desperate to see people that are fully alive.”  Jordan 

“I went to Christian school for 13 years. And I remember frequently sitting in chapel, and quietly dreading the thought of heaven.

“We are called to keep watch for Christ’s return, not by sitting on our hands and waiting for heaven to drop from the sky, but by working with our hands and joining him in cultivating heaven on earth today.” - Jordan Raynor 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

How does the Biblical idea of stewarding your time change your daily work life?  

Work - life balance is not limited to the workplace: It’s also the work of running a home, and it’s a challenge for most couples to share this load well. Today Dr. Kim is sharing some of his best tips for finding balance in the home. 

The struggle to find work - life balance does not end when you get home in the evening. Taking care of a home and family is a huge portion of our workload that you can’t ignore. But you can find ways to handle it well – TOGETHER!

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.

Episode highlights include:  

Tips for spouses who work outside the home 

Tips for those who work from home 

Tips for stay-at-home parents 

Signs you & your spouse need to work toward better balance 

The need for boundaries to help with balance; how to work on them together

What to do if you get stuck, or if you’ve tried to address things and it’s not working

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

Resolving conflict doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It takes work, but when you talk and listen well, you’ll find that most things, you can resolve. - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

At the end of your life,  you’re not going to look back and say, “I wish I’d looked at my phone a few more times.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling  

If you get stuck, it’s ok to get help.  - Dr. Kim Kimberling

The things that matter work themselves out in the very small details of life. - Lindsay Few

Maybe you think everyone else is doing it all, so you’re trying to do it all. I don’t think that’s realistic or healthy. - Lindsay Few 

It’s easy to fall in those traps and not really know that you’ve even fallen into them. - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

We have to make sure we’re saying what we mean and what we need instead of just hoping our spouse catches the hint. - Lindsay few 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

Is the workload in your home balanced?  

Do you have a mentor couple in your life? 

Are your boundaries with tech (screentime, phones) working well? 

Talk with your spouse and rate how you’re doing with work / life balance together, on a scale of 1-10? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Get all the details about our limited time Sexy Bundle HERE 

Team You & Me 

For more help with setting healthy boundaries, listen to our Boundaries Series:

Boundaries For Your Marriage: What They Are and Why They Are Important | Ep. 544

Boundaries Within Your Marriage | Ep. 546

Boundaries Outside Your Marriage | Ep. 547

How to Set Marriage Boundaries | Ep. 548

Boundaries & Marriage: What NOT to Do | Ep. 550

Real Stories of Healthy Marriage Boundaries | Ep. 551

Boundaries Q & A | Ep. 552

Boundaries Course

Practically speaking, balance is hard to find, and even harder to maintain. While work-life balance is a very common issue, it IS possible to alleviate unnecessary stress and find better balance. 

In today’s episode Dr Kim will share practical tips to help you find that balance. Dr. Kim shares some of the common pain points that he sees couples facing, and some of the best ways he’s seen to deal with those. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Tips to help you handle the stress between spouses so that your marriage tension doesn’t add onto the stress of work-life balance 

Some early signs of burnout you cannot afford to ignore 

The importance of making peace with imperfection

Helpful perspective tips for both career and extracurricular commitments 

Practical tips for work-from-home balance 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our 4 Week Connection Challenge for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“I was saying no to my family a lot because I was saying yes to all these other things.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“Figure out who you are, who you’re working for, what do you really want, and what do you need to get there. Sometimes we get on that treadmill and we just keep going.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“I think it is changing, but there’s still a culture that glorifies overwork, burnout and hustle. It can be hard to step out of that because it feels important to be in it.”  - Lindsay Few 

“We have a God that is bigger than my mistakes and imperfections. If I really think the world depends on me being perfect, then I’ve got a problem.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“You don’t just get balanced and stay balanced forever. It’s a constant work in progress.” - Lindsay Few

“We look around and everyone’s dealing with this, so we just think this is normal. If something has resonated with you, it’s okay to acknowledge that you want things to go better.” - Lindsay Few

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

4 reflection questions to help you move forward: What worked, what do I want to do more of, what didn’t work, what do I want to do less of? 

 God wants you to thrive. Trust that when you seek these answers, He will answer.  

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

We mentioned this podcast episode with Gary Thomas 

Get all the details about our limited time Sexy Bundle HERE 

Learn more about what makes expectations healthy in “Unpack Your Expectations, Unfrustrate Your Life” and try a week of Online Women’s Bible Study, FREE! 

Does your home echo with the sounds of sibling squabbles?

Do you wish for more connection with your kids?

If so, today’s episode is for you! Don & Suzanne Manning, the founders of Crazy Cool Family, are passionate about equipping Christian families with strategies to cultivate a family culture they ALL enjoy living with! 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Effective ways to protect kids from screen & tech temptations

Where to invest your time and energy for the best parenting outcomes - and where NOT to 

The goal of disciplining our kids and how to work toward it 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“Don’t look at the outside and all the fearful things - don't waste your time and energy there: You’re going after your kids’ heart.” - Suzanne Manning

“Kids are wired to want us on their team. They want our input. ”  - Suzanne Manning

 “Control is based in fear, and connection is based in love.” - Don Manning 

“Most people try to control, because we don’t know what to do. But it doesn’t work.” Dr Kim Kimberling  

“We never tell parents they need to work harder. They need to work differently. Becoming an encourager and being a listener are two ways to do that.” - Don Manning  

“Our children are going to go where the encouragement is.” - Suzanne Manning 

“Because of technology and culture, connection today is more important than it’s ever been.” - Don Manning 

“The goal of discipline is self-control. When situations come up, they are opportunities to build self control in my kids. Opportunities to build them up for the next stage of life.” - Don Manning 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

 Do you lean more toward connection, or control?

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find more resources and info from Don & Suzanne at CrazyCoolFamily.com

Listen to the Crazy Cool Family Podcast 

Reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, AND strengthen your bond as a couple with THIS: Our 30-Day Communication Challenge! 

Need more communication help? Sign up here to save your spot for Dr. Kim’s FREE webinar,  “7 Common Communication Mistakes Couples Make”

Questions about gaslighting, narcissism and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or DM us on Instagram. Dr. Kim will answer them in an upcoming episode 

Are you uncertain with your  food choices or unhappy with your body? Is it possible to truly be at peace with food and your body? If you’re not comfortable with your body, this will spill over into your marriage. Gaining a biblical perspective with this will help you heal your relationship with your body and food choices, and in turn, your marriage. 

Today we are delighted to have Brittany Braswell joining us to tackle these personal and often painful topics, and share hope, help, and Biblical perspective on these topics. Brittany is a Registered Dietician, Christian speaker and host of the Joy-Filled Eater Podcast, and a wealth of wisdom and encouragement on navigating these challenging topics.  

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

What does Scripture actually say about body image? 

How our view of our body impacts our marriage

Brittany’s 1st priority for her clients’ nutrition – this might surprise you!

Tips to handle food choices if you and your spouse are not on the same page  

Ways to support your spouse if they are struggling in this area

Ways to ask for your spouse’s support if you’re struggling in this area  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“So much of it is our perception: If I see my body negatively, then I’m assuming my spouse does too.” - Brittany Braswell 

“The Lord blessed us with this variety of flavors and gave us taste buds to be able to enjoy them!” -  Brittany Braswell 

“It’s ok to ask for help. You don’t have to meet a certain criteria to deserve some support.”  -  Brittany Braswell 

“We can eat in a way that helps our bodies to thrive so that our bodies don’t become the thing that holds us back from fulfilling the calling and purpose God has placed on our lives.” -  Brittany Braswell  

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

If it’s hard for you to believe it when your spouse says they are attracted to you, dig a little deeper: Why is it hard to believe?  

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

For more wisdom on these topics, listen to Brittany’s podcast, The Joy Filled Eater

Here’s the episode on gluttony she mentioned in today’s conversation with Dr. Kim 

Find Free Resources as well as coaching, courses & community on Brittanys’ website BrittanyBraswellRD.com 

Facebook Support Group: Food Freedom and Body Image Support for Christian Women 

Follow her on Instagram 

If you want to avoid communication breakdowns in your marriage, today’s episode is for you!

Today, Dr. Kim is going to share 3 very common mistakes he sees as he counsels couples, so that you can avoid them! Whether you need a total overhaul or just a few friendly reminders, today’s episode has practical, actionable advice that will help you improve the communication in your marriage. 

Are you making the same mistakes most couples make with communication? Dr. Kim has pretty much seen it all, and today he is going to help you avoid those mistakes, and build better communication instead. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

 3 of the most common mistakes Dr. Kim sees over and over with couples he counsels: Blame, discounting, and distraction. 

The impact each of these mistakes has on a spouse and marriage

The practical steps to avoid each of these communication pitfalls 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

When you resolve conflict, both of you have to take responsibility for your part in it. I’ve never seen an issue where 1 person was 100% responsible. - Dr. Kim 

I think it’s easy for us to rationalize, fool ourselves, and take the time to think it through.  - Dr. Kim 

I’ve done it, I’ve seen it in other wives: It’s easy for us in parenting to discount our husband’s opinion. - Lindsay 

Listen in a way that you can let them know you heard what they said. - Dr. Kim 

As a parent with kids in the home, it’s great to have the reminder that they are benefitting from us putting boundaries that let us have an adult relationship with our spouse. As important as they are to us, we should value showing them that solid foundation and modeling marriage for them.  - Lindsay 

I identify with all three of these, I’ve done them all. I’ts not something you just get right then coast, you have to stay on top of it. - Dr. Kim  

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

Do you use “I” statements to communicate what you need with your spouse? 

For example: Instead of, “You always ignore me when I’m talking,” say, “I feel hurt when you scroll on your phone when I’m talking. I want to know that you care about what I have to say.” 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Need more communication help? Sign up here to save your spot for Dr. Kim’s FREE webinar,  “7 Common Communication Mistakes Couples Make”

Questions about gaslighting, narcissism and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or DM us on Instagram. Dr. Kim will answer them in an upcoming episode 

Want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, OR just strengthen your bond as a couple? Our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you! 

With Dr. Kim’s One Thing email, you’ll get one practical tip each weekday to build your marriage.

The Marriage Multiplier is a quick weekly email that gives you practical ways to be intentional to grow your marriage. Sign up HERE! 

While their life appeared to be successful, fun and amazing, Andy and Sara’s marriage was at a breaking point. Their life was at a high point, but their relationship had reached a low. In today’s episode they share how their marriage recovered.

Can a marriage survive the damage of gaslighting and blame? Today’s episode is proof it can. Dr. Kim got to witness a complete transformation in Andy and Sara’s marriage. Their story is full of grace and hope, and we are so thankful to them for sharing it with us today.

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

How did things look good from the outside for as long as they did?

How Sara used waiting to grow closer to God 

The turning point that allowed Andy to start to change

The specific process that changed Andy from the inside out 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“We lived this big, giant, amazing life. The problem was, I was getting wrapped more and more into my success, thinking I was this great gift to humanity.” - Andy  

“I felt like he didn’t know me. He didn’t know my heart.” - Sara

“I was searching for the world to fill that void in my chest that only God can fill.” - Andy  

“You need to meditate and delight in the word of God to change the trajectory of your life.” Pastor Mike (via Andy) 

“The Lord didn’t care about all my success. He wanted me broken at the foot of the cross.” - Andy 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

What are the little things your spouse does that make you feel loved? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Questions about gaslighting and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or over on Instagram for Dr. Kim to answer in an upcoming episode 

Want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, OR just strengthen your bond as a couple? Our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you! 

Your faith is a foundation for every aspect of life. So when you’re not on the same page with your spouse spiritually, it can make marriage more complicated.

Dr. Kim has helped couples deal with this situation time and time again, and in today’s episode he shares valuable insight into how you can deal with spiritual disunity in your marriage. 

Episode highlights include:  

Practical ways to pursue unity when you’re not unified on faith

The common mistakes Dr. Kim sees spouses make in this situation 

The major shift your marriage needs to start thriving

How to change your focus in order to enjoy your marriage 

 We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“God loves them, and knows them so much better than you do, and He knows what works and doesn’t work for that person.” Dr. Kim Kimberling

“Just accepting your spouse and not trying to change them is essential. You can’t really have a thriving marriage until you make that shift.” - Lindsay Few 

“Growth hurts, but I’m glad I’m not the same as I was.” - Lindsay Few 

“My life is so much different and better because I married Nancy, even though some of it was so hard for both of us.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

Have you let go of trying to change your spouse, and let God take over that job? 

Pray and ask God: How can I love my spouse well today? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

When your marriage is struggling, everything feels more overwhelming. We created  21 Prayers for Struggling Marriage to help make praying for your marriage less challenging. God is the one who can change your hearts and your marriage for the better, so inviting him to do those things is the best thing you can do for your marriage.

Do you want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding & connection with your spouse, or strengthen your bond as a couple? If you do, then our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you! 

No one loves talking finances, but we do think you’ll love today’s conversation with Julie Baumgardner! Julie shares how to get curious about what money means to your spouse, how two spouses’ separate financial backgrounds and “money stories” can stop being a source of tension, and start becoming a shared value. 

Listen to this episode if you’re ready to get on the same page with your spouse about finances this season - without fighting about them! 

Episode highlights include:  

 Questions to start a productive conversation about finances with your spouse

How to uncover the hidden money lessons you learned growing up, then to get on the same page with your spouse. 

What recent research says about the connection of money and marital happiness 

How to learn more about your spouse’s perspective about money 

Ways to work together toward shared values around money in your marriage

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES:

“You have different perspectives about money. You don’t necessarily talk about what it means to you, how you think about it, therefore you argue about it.” - Julie Baumgardner  

“You can have conversations about money without having to be methodical about every single penny.” - Julie Baumgardner 

“If you can’t figure out how to live within your means with a little, it will be very complicated to figure out how to live within your means with a lot.” - Julie Baumgardner 

“It isn’t ‘You’re right, I’m wrong,’ you’re being curious. And in being curious, you’re learning.” - Julie Baumgardner 

“If you can tell that money is creating stress, what is it about money that’s stressful?” - Julie Baumgardner 

“Keep your eyes wide open for where God is calling you to join Him in his work. Be aware, and where you see a need, be a Kingdom builder. ” - Julie Baumgardner 

QUESTIONS FOR YOU:

What matters most to the two of you when it comes to money? It’s never too late to define your core values around money in your marriage. 

What is it about money that’s stressful?  If it’s “what ifs," then name the what-ifs and talk through them. 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Winshape Marriage online and on Instagram

Find the Money Habitudes game online 

🎉 Giveaway time! We are giving away a bundle of our TOP 3 RESOURCES of 2023: 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am CST.

Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here!

Is it possible to parent without fear of the teen years? We say yes! So does today’s guest, Kristen Hatton. We are delighted to have Kristen on the podcast today to share how to prepare for some of the aspects of parenting teens that many parents find daunting. 

Episode highlights include: 

 Kristen shares ways to know if your fears are becoming idols in parenting 

Proactive VS reactive parenting: Which one are you? 

The difference between overparenting and underparenting and how they affect your kids 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES 

“Frequently parents are living in “reactive” mode, and often it’s because we’re just so busy.”  - Kristen Hatton 

“If I always say yes to my kids going in different directions with their friends, or being on a travel team, and we’re always just so busy, then all the sudden, church goes by the wayside. Family time goes by the wayside." - Kristen Hatton  

“Often, what children experience from their parents is how they view God. So I want them to know my unconditional love and acceptance, so that they see that that’s how God is too.” - Kristen Hatton 

QUESTIONS: 

To evaluate if something you love has become an idol: Are you holding it with an open palm, or a clenched fist? Can you be OK without it? 

Evaluate your emotions to help you see your idols. Ask: Why am I so angry? Why am I so irritable? Is something controlling me? What occupies my time, habits, thoughts, money, and conversations?

Talk with your spouse to decide: 

What do we want most for our family? How are we doing to get there?

What do we want to impart to our kids? 

What will we allow? What won’t we allow? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Learn more from Kristen: 

Follow her @RedemptiveParenting on Instagram

Find all of her books and resources at KristenHatton.com 

Get Biblical wisdom for parenting teens in her book Parenting Ahead 

GIVEAWAY TIME! We are giving away a bundle of our TOP 3 RESOURCES of 2023: 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am CST. 

Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here! 

Holiday season is upon us, and with it all things festive! I’m guessing your schedule didn’t have much extra space to begin with, so now there’s a risk of becoming truly overbooked. How can your marriage be a priority, even with so much going on? 

Today Dr. Kim is sharing several of his best tips for prioritizing your marriage, even in this busy season. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Ways to share the load of holiday tasks & preparation better 

How prioritizing your marriage this season can decrease your stress 

Dr. Kim’s 5 ways to prioritize your marriage this season 

How to implement this if you aren’t on the same page right now

Tips to de-stress your holiday gatherings and enjoy them more 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES: 

“It doesn’t have to be a whole evening, it doesn’t even have to be a whole hour. It can be just 15 minutes, but you protect that time.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling  

“I think quality time is one of the most important things we do in a marriage, and it also seems to be one of the easiest to bump.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“Make sure you're on the same page together, then enjoy it together.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“There’s so much unnecessary tension you can eliminate if you can start to use team language and work together.” - Lindsay Few  

QUESTIONS

 What is one favorite Christmas tradition you and your spouse have, just for the two of you? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

GIVEAWAY TIME! We are giving away a bundle of our Top 3 Resources of 2023: Our 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am EST. 

Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here! 

Related episode: “What is team Language? Ep. 501”

You can reduce the stress and conflict in your marriage simply by creating margin. Today’s episode unpacks several practical ways to create margin in your marriage. Scripture demonstrates how essential a healthy mindset is, so all month we’re getting practical about how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Tune into today’s episode to learn how to create margin in your marriage.  

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage! 

Episode highlights include: 

The practice Dr. Kim recommends to help you build margin into your marriage and the free resource we offer to make this simple to do

Mindset shifts to help you find margin

Practical ways to prioritize your marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“It’s not just carving out more time for each other, it’s how you use that time.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“We talk about your home and marriage being a refuge. You want to create that.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“It’s worth the effort to get intentional about this and get on the same page, so you can tackle it as a team.” Lindsay Few 

“Learning to really listen makes a big difference. There’s so much value to feeling heard, and knowing that your spouse cares to really listen.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“One thing that really helped us is when we realized we were not each other’s enemy.”   - Dr. Kim Kimberling

“Be ok with being counter cultural if that’s what’s best for your family and your marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling

QUESTIONS: 

How can you and your spouse work together to create more margin in your marriage? 

How can you work together to create a culture of grace in your marriage? 

What do you really want for your marriage? What do you need to say no to in this season to make that happen? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Contentment doesn’t come easily, but is more than worth the effort. Take the steps to grow your contentment with our 15-Day Contentment Challenge! It’s yours for a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday! 

Dr. Kim highly recommends a Weekly Check In for every couple  – so to make this simple for you, we have created a Weekly Marriage Check In Guide. You can snag this resource for free when you sign up for the One Thing to Grow Your Marriage email series!

We really enjoyed the book “Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” mentioned in today’s episode

Cut the stress out of gift giving this Christmas. If shopping for your spouse (and anyone else on your list) feels daunting, this episode is for you. In this episode Patrick Kucharson, the Better Gift Coach, shares how to give gifts that will resonate with their recipients, strategies to become a better gift-giver, and great gift tips for any budget (including free!).

Tune in to learn more! 

Episode highlights include: 

Simple strategies to know what they really want 

Why you need to make brainstorming gift ideas a team sport - and who to recruit to your team

The categories of not-so-good gifts you do not want to fall into this Christmas! 

Patrick’s Golden Rule of Gift-Giving

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“How much thought you put into a gift doesn’t necessarily translate into the value the gift recipient will assign to it.” - Patrick Kucharson 

“Give gifts that you know they want to receive, over gifts that you want to give.” - Patrick Kucharson 

“It’s showing that you appreciate them. You’re listening.”  - Patrick Kucharson 

“A shortcut for gift-giving: Look around, take note of the negatives, and try to give gifts that will remove them.” - Patrick Kucharson 

QUESTIONS: 

What’s your favorite gift you’ve given your spouse, and what made it great? 

Who can you recruit to your “gift brainstorming team” this season? 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Patrick’s Better Gift Coach free weekly email is every bit as entertaining and insightful Patrick was on today’s podcast! Sign up HERE! 

You can also find him on Instagram

In the midst of all the gift talk, take time to look for something only God can give: Contentment. Grad our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with your donation of ANY amount and pursue true contentment.

Gratitude is a powerful mindset – it affects our mind, our marriage, even our physical health! 

Scripture is clear that our mindset is very important, so this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage.

Today we’re talking about the power of gratitude. What makes this trait so important, and how can we cultivate it? Tune in for all the details! 

Episode highlights include: 

Dr. Kim and Lindsay share how gratitude helped them each deal with depression

The way gratitude helps your marriage and your outlook on life

Why growing in gratitude actually ends up leading to – more gratitude!

Practical ways to cultivate gratitude in every day 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

QUOTES

“I think we’re wired to give thanks and be grateful to God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“When we acknowledge on a regular basis what we’re thankful for, we tend to be happier and less depressed.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“It’s looking at what’s actually happening in my life. What is God doing? What is here today? It brings you back into the present.”-  Lindsay Few 

“I think the more we acknowledge who He is in our lives and worship him for that, that goes a long way to changing our gratitude.”  - Dr. Kim Kimberling 

“I don't think God put us together to grumble for 50 years. I think He put us together to grow, to learn, and to be grateful.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling  

“I think it helps us to serve our spouse and serve our God better when our frame of mind is healthier. And I think gratitude makes it healthier.” -  Dr. Kim Kimberling  

QUESTIONS

So many things in the world are out of our control, but God IS in control. What is 1 reason you are thankful that He is in control today? 

When you think something good about your spouse, say it! What do you appreciate about your spouse? 

What is 1 thing you can do to be more present with your spouse today?

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Contentment doesn’t come easily, but is more than worth the effort! Grab our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday! LEARN MORE HERE!

The 27 Scripture Prayer Cards resource is a beautiful way to remember scripture and to bring the power of prayer into your marriage each day!

It’s the perfect time to sign up for Dr. Kim’s daily One Thing to Grow Your Marriage email series, since this week’s emails give you simple ways to practice gratitude with your spouse

Has blame crept into your marriage? If so, your marriage is certainly suffering its effects. But it does not have to stay that way! Today Dr. Kim helps you discover how to identify and remove this damaging habit from your marriage.  

Scripture is clear that our mindset matters, and that we have the ability to change our minds! So this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Dig in today to start dismantling the blame.

Episode highlights include: 

How to identify - and break - subtle blame patterns 

Why expecting each spouse to give their 50% share to the marriage just doesn’t add up 

Dr. Kim and Lindsay get real about how blame has impacted their marriages 

How to remove blame from our efforts to show our spouse love

How to address the issue healthily instead

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Dr. Kim mentioned this article from Harvard Health in the episode

Contentment doesn’t come easily, but it’s SO worth the work! Get our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday! Learn more here!

 15 Daily Prayers Bundle 

More mindset resources: 

Dr. Kim’s Mind Craft Plan

Switch On Your Brain by Dr. Leaf (includes the “21-Day Brain Detox”) 

Calling all military spouses AND frequent travelers: Do not miss this bonus episode! Today we’re thrilled to have Jen McDonald of Milspouse Matters join us on the podcast. Jen is full of wisdom and warmth as well as practical tips and advice on how to weather a marriage separated by distance and the unique challenges of military life. Tune in and be encouraged by her story!  

Episode highlights include: 

The parts of military life that Jen was NOT prepared for 

The realities of deployment and reintegration 

Practical things that helped her marriage stay connected during deployment 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find Jen on Facebook, Instagram and on Twitter (X) 

Get Jen’s Amazon bestselling book: You Are Not Alone: Encouragement for the Heart of a Military Spouse

And her new book Milspouse Matters: Sharing Strength Through Our Stories

She also has several Military Spouse Resources on her site (including the The 5-Day Deployment Devotional and deployment resources for families and kids). Jen has graciously offered our listeners 10% off when you use the code marriage10 at checkout! (Discount available through 12/31/23.) 

Resources for kids / families: 

The Comfort Crew for Military Kids

Military Child Education Coalition

Military Kids Connect  

Military OneSource (info and support for families)

Military and Family Life Counseling Program (free!)

What does  it mean to “reframe?” And how can you know if you need to do it? Reframing is a term Dr. Kim has used in past episodes, and today we learn exactly what it means and the practical steps to do it. 

Scripture is clear that our mindset is very important, so this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Tune into today’s episode for the details! 

Episode highlights include: 

The Biblical basis and Scripture to support the concept of reframing

Practical steps of the reframing process

What to do if your spouse frames you negatively

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Dr. Kim’s Mind Craft Plan (I accidentally referred to it as Mind Your Marriage in the episode) is a great place to start! 

Caroline Leaf’s book, Switch On Your Brain includes the “21-Day Brain Detox” Dr. Kim mentioned in the episode 

The Weekly Marriage Check In is a great way to stay connected with your spouse, and you get this printable resource FREE when you sign up for the One Thing email! Get all the details here. 

Being self-aware is a gift to your marriage, yourself and everyone around you! Our Self Check In Guide is a tool to take you through the process of growing self-aware. 

Dr. Kim mentioned our Marriage Changers Membership, where he and Nancy share exclusive video content each month. Marriage Changers also get automatic access to each new monthly resource we create. Learn more here. 

Scripture references: 

Romans 12:2

Proverbs 4:23  

1 Corinthians 2:16  

Romans 8:6

You know that moment when things go quickly from okay to “What just happened?” in your marriage? Suddenly there’s tension and you’re totally disconnected.

Today, we are so happy to have Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill join us on the podcast. They do a great job explaining what goes wrong in that moment, and how to prevent it from happening again. Tune in to learn more! 

Episode highlights include: 

The shift that completely changed how they approached conflict 

The 1 question to stop asking in fights and the better 1 to ask instead 

The Hills unpack what it means that identity is the #1 human need, and how that plays out in marriage

A practical tool to easily learn how to emotions well together   

How disconnection can affect family life and strategies to handle it 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find more from Dr. Glenn and Phyllis at their website: https://www.connectioncodes.co/ and make sure to use the code AWESOME20 for 20% off any of their classes! 

Learn more about using this process to connect in their book: The Connection Codes or on The Connection Codes Podcast!

Download your free copy of the Hill’s Core Emotion Wheel!

You are invited to Dr. Kim’s free webinar, 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair in Your Marriage. Get all the details HERE  

We’re so used to seeing sex allll around us - skin sells, after all! But today, Joshua Ryan Butler shows us how we are still likely to miss so much of what sex is designed to show us. Sex is everywhere – except being talked about by the married couples who are (hopefully!) having it, and the churches and families who desperately need a robust theology of God’s purpose for sex and sexuality.

Today’s episode takes a look at why sex is so much more than right / wrong or rules, and why that truth is incredibly freeing. Tune in to learn more. 

Episode highlights include: 

Why does it matter what we believe about God’s purpose for sex? 

How to unpack the tension between what culture says vs church says about sex 

Why a better relationship with God leads to better sex in your marriage (and a better marriage in general!) 

Specifically why our male / female differences are so valuable 

The shift from rule-keeping to image-bearing and what it means for our lives 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Find more from Joshua on his website at Joshuaryanbutler.com

If you enjoyed today’s episode, you will love Joshua’s new book, Beautiful Union! 

You can break the conflict cycle in your marriage! Dr. Kim is hosting a FREE webinar on Friday 10/27. Get all the details HERE 

Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage HERE

This is the place for honest conversations and practical advice on how to have an awesome marriage. In this brief trailer, Dr. Kim Kimberling and co-host Lindsay Few share what you can expect to hear on the Awesome Marriage podcast each week. 

If you enjoy the podcast, follow along here or at awesomemarriage.com/podcast for questions in each week's show notes that will help you and your spouse apply the info in each episode. 

We pray this content is helpful for you and your marriage! 

* Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

* You can find all of Awesome Marriage's helpful resources on our website. 

What is a gospel perspective of sexuality? It’s hard to answer, since too often, sex is not talked about in the church. Yet it’s literally everywhere in the world around us. Most couples struggle with their sex life at some point and parents are deeply concerned about helping their kids navigate the topic in a God-honoring way in the midst of all of culture’s chaos. That is why we are honored to have Dr. Juli Slattery on the podcast today, sharing her vast knowledge and wisdom on the subject. You don’t want to miss what she has to say. 

Episode highlights include: 

Why a biblical worldview of sexuality is actually very freeing

How disruptions to your sex life can become a springboard to greater intimacy 

4 specific aspects of God’s love that should define healthy sex in marriage 

The process to engage so you can equip your kids to navigate sexuality biblically

Encouragement for couples who are struggling in this area 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

For more great info from Juli: 

Her newest book: God, Sex, and Your Marriage 

Her podcast:  Java with Juli 

Her website: authenticintimacy.com

Books by the authors mentioned in the episode: 

Celebration of Sex, by Douglas Rosenau,  

The Married Guy’s Guide to Great Sex and Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women, both by Cliff and Joyce Penner 

Refresh your marriage this fall with the 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat. The retreat is live NOW! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage. It’s packed with teaching sessions from our amazing speakers to bring you practical ways to break through the barriers that keep your marriage from being awesome. Click HERE for all the details! 

Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom when you get your head in the game with the Think Sex Challenge! 

This week it’s the husbands’ turn to weigh in. Today we hear what men said they wish their wives knew about sex. Would your husband agree? Dr. Kim strongly encourages couples to talk about their sex life, not argue about it, but… most couples don’t! So listening to today’s episode together is an easy way to start the conversation. 

Sex in your marriage matters because God created it to draw spouses together, but all too often pain and tension lead to exactly the opposite. Tune in today to learn the next steps in your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Some common Christian sex myths that might be hindering your sex life...

... And what the Bible says about them

Some really effective ways to talk about sex with your spouse ...

... And some others you definitely want to avoid

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom with the Think Sex Challenge

The 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat launches THIS WEEK! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage and this retreat is packed with helpful sessions from amazing speakers. Click HERE for all the details! 

Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage. 

Has sex has fallen down the list of priorities? In Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half Dr. Kim and Nancy tell how they have handled the challenges to their sex life later in marriage. 

We highly recommend the book Celebration of Sex to educate yourself and your spouse on exactly what works for the two of you!

The wives have spoken! Today we share what women said they wish their husbands knew about sex. Would your wife agree? Dr. Kim wants couples to talk about their sex life, not argue about it! So an easy way to start is by listening to today’s episode together and talking about it.  

Sex in your marriage matters because God created it to draw spouses together, but all too often pain and tension lead to exactly the opposite. Tune in today to get the conversation started!  

Episode highlights include: 

Tips to help balance the mental load spouses are carrying 

Women don’t get tired of their husband’s compliments – with this 1 exception!

Practical reasons why it can be helpful to schedule sex 

Addressing assumptions spouses make that will deter them from great sex 

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom with the Think Sex Challenge

Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage. 

Has sex has fallen down the list of priorities? In Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half Dr. Kim and Nancy tell how they have handled the challenges to their sex life later in marriage.

We highly recommend the book Celebration of Sex to educate yourself and your spouse on exactly what works for the two of you!

The 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat launches NEXT WEEK! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage and this retreat is packed with helpful sessions from amazing speakers. Click HERE for all the details! 

We are delighted to have Toni Collier on the podcast today. Toni has spoken and written plenty about the way that embracing brokenness, though counterintuitive, is the key to experiencing a full life in Christ. She talked to Dr. Kim about how –and why– to effectively embrace your brokenness personally, what that means, and what it can do for your marriage and family. Don’t miss this grace-filled episode!

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The faith “secret” that transformed Toni’s perspective on brokenness

The deeply personal origin of Toni’s new book, and why a children’s book is so important  

The biggest mistake she made early in marriage, and how she recovered 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Be sure to check out Toni’s children’s book Broken Crayons Still Color! It is beautifully designed to help kids deal with big feelings and gain the tools to handle them well. 

And don’t miss Toni’s book, Brave Enough to Be Broken: How to Embrace Your Pain and Discover Hope and Healing, which is full of Biblical wisdom and practical tools to help you heal right where you are today! 

Grow closer to God while you grow closer to your spouse with the 2-Week Couple’s Scripture Challenge! Click through for more info. 

The mind is a powerful sex organ, and the 25-Day Think Sex Challenge is designed to help you harness that power to experience more fun, intimate and fulfilling sex in your marriage. 

Ministry couples face both unique joys and unique challenges. If you’ve been around Awesome Marriage for a while, you’ve probably heard Dr. Kim say to put God first and your spouse second. But when your job is ministry, it can be really hard to balance your vocational ministry with your primary ministry - your marriage. Today we’re talking about how to keep your marriage thriving when you are in ministry.

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The surprising data on how ministry affects marriage and family 

Our personal experiences of what makes ministry hard on marriage

What to do if you work in a ministry culture that does not prioritize marriage or family

4 specific ways to protect and build your marriage 

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE: 

Don't let your ministry take out your marriage! The Sustaining Your Marriage In Ministry online course was designed to help you through the challenges you face. Learn more HERE.

Our friends at Emotionally Healthy Discipleship offer resources that equip leaders to lead from their inner life with Christ.  

Anything you want to hear about that we missed today? Shoot me an email and let us know! 

You may know Jeff Allen from one of his many comedy specials on DryBar Comedy, Netflix, Amazon, YouTube, network TV and more. If you do, you know he can make you laugh about even the hard parts of life and marriage.

In today’s episode we get to go behind the scenes of some of the hardest seasons Jeff and his wife, Tami, experienced in their marriage, and how God brought hope, healing and redemption. Don’t miss this encouraging episode! 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The *surprisingly* effective way Jeff’s comedian friend helped him find Jesus 

What changed in Jeff and Tami’s  marriage when Jesus entered the picture 

Jeff’s journey to sobriety and learning new coping mechanisms 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Get the rest of Jeff and Tami’s story in Jeff’s Book “Are We There Yet?: My Journey from a Messed Up to Meaningful Life.”

Jeff’s comedy is a part of this year’s Online Marriage Retreat! Registration is open NOW so click over to learn more! 

If it’s been a while since you felt sexy or were excited about your sex life, our 25-Day Think Sex Challenge will help you get back in the mood! Learn more HERE!

Your mindset has a powerful impact on everything in your life - including your marriage. Is yours helping or hurting your marriage? Today Dr. Kim shares some sneaky ways your thoughts might be harming your marriage, without you even realizing it, as well as practical advice for how to overcome them. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

How to identify and correct unhealthy thought patterns 

Why even our fleeting thoughts matter

One thing that prevents many of us from being honest with God and with ourselves, and how to overcome it  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Work on healing your mindset with the “Cut the Criticism and Cultivate Companionship” Bible Reading plan on YouVersion  

If you’re a One Thing Subscriber, you know all about Dr. Kim’s Daily Declarations already! If not, sign up HERE and receive a practical daily step each Monday-Friday to help you be intentional about building your marriage.

When you sign up for Dr. Kim’s weekly Dispatch email, you receive a copy of his Daily Declarations FREE as a sign up bonus! 

One reason marriage can be difficult is because it faces real spiritual opposition. 1 Peter 5:8 says the enemy is like “a roaring lion looking for someone to devour,” who would love to destroy us and our marriages. But Christian couples can be confident that God is on our side, He is for us and He has the victory. 

So how can we be on guard and ready to fight for our marriage, spiritually? Tune in today to learn how.  We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Reasons why marriage is a target of spiritual attacks 

Ways spiritual attacks can show up in marriage

Steps to fight back and fight for your marriage in those times 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Dr. Kim shared his heart behind our Marriage Changers membership in today’s episode. Get more info on the membership HERE.  

We are happy to have 50+ AM YouVersion plans. Here are the two we mentioned in this episode: 

Learning to Apologize Well In Marriage 

Praying Over your home 

If you haven’t already, check out our perennial fave House Prayer Cards. They’re Like Dr. Kim’s scripture on the walls thing, but without needing to repaint! 

Our 2-Week Couples Scripture Challenge helps you fight for your marriage by building the habit of getting into God’s Word together. 

How should the rhythms of our child’s season of life inform our parenting? How can your family rhythms and routines cultivate the kind of family atmosphere you are longing for in your household and set your child up for success?

Today our special guest Nellie Harden helps you see where you are in this season of your child’s growing up years and how to parent well in this time.  

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The perspective shift to more peaceful parenting 

Why to number the days of your child’s childhood 

How our own perfectionism affects our kids and our parenting 

The parenting shift we need in the second half of childhood 

A practical way to reduce sibling strife  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Find Nellie’s book, learn more about the 6570 Family Project and more on her website  

Here’s the article Nellie wrote for Focus on The Family that we loved: “Family on the Rocks!”

Taking a few minutes a week to check up on your marriage is simple and effective with the Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide

Our 27 Scripture Prayer Cards are both beautiful AND powerful! 

This time of year, so many families are thinking about how to make this new school year go even better than the last. You may be wondering how you can possibly build in helpful, healthy rhythms when you’re Already. So. Busy. If so, you do not want to miss this episode. 

Today our guest Justin Earley shares how to build intentionality and meaning into your existing family habits. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

What our messy attempts at forming good habits can communicate to our kids (you might be surprised!) 

The perspective shift that lets you take advantage of your family’s existing habits for good 

What does it actually mean to be a spiritual leader? 

Practical advice for wives who want their husband to lead spiritually 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Hear more on these topics in Justin’s books: 

The Common Rule: Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction

Habits of the Household: Practicing the Story of God in Everyday Family Rhythms

Made for People: Why We Drift into Loneliness and How to Fight for a Life of Friendship

Find resources, writing an more from Justin at Justinwhitmelearley.com

The Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide makes it simple to check in with your spouse each week.  

Ever wondered why you can’t break a habit you hate or form a new one you want to start? Today’s bonus episode is for you! Debra Fileta always brings wisdom and practical tools to help us connect spiritual practices with mental health and relationship health, and we’re delighted to have Debra back on the podcast with us today. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Why issues seem to surface at unexpected times and what you can do about it

The equation that leads to lasting change - and why most people get it wrong 

How to effectively begin to break bad habits  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Debra has also been on these past episodes: 

Choosing Marriage: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 207

Love In Every Season: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 411

Are You Really OK? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 471

Oneness Vs. Codependency - What's the Difference? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 511

We think you’ll love Debra’s new book, RESET: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life

Are you getting the Marriage Multiplier? It’s a quick weekly email from Dr. Kim that gives you ways to intentionally invest in your marriage. Sign up HERE. 

As we enter the fall season, it’s a great time to look at the routines in your life. This month we’re talking all about life-giving routines and rhythms. Sometimes in marriage, we can get into bad habits of conflict or miscommunication, BUT we can also use our habits and routines to build up our spouse and grow our marriage. Today we’re sharing some of our personal routines and family rhythms that help keep our marriages strong.

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

 Dr. Kim’s personal routine and why it’s so important to him 

The small things that don’t even feel like “things” – and why they matter so much 

Practical ways to build the kind of culture you want to have in your marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

RESOURCES: 

If you’re not getting Dr. Kim’s One Thing daily email, sign up HERE! 

The Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide makes it simple to check in with your spouse each week.  

Get a better dinner experience when you bring good questions to the table with 52 Questions for Your Family Table

We talk to a lot of couples who don't know what makes them a great team. And if you don’t know what makes you a great team, how can you operate as one? All too often, opposites attract and it takes intentionality to tap into all that God has for you in the gift of your marriage.

So today we’re talking about leaning into what makes you a uniquely gifted team in your marriage, and resolving the tension that comes from the ways we differ from our spouse. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

What are the common issues that keep couples from being a strong team? 

Dr. Kim gives great ideas of creative solutions to issues 

How to combat the competition that sometimes creeps into marriage

We share ways we’ve personally done this in our marriages 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Get the team conversation started with Team You & Me: A Guide to Approaching Your Marriage as a Team, a resource designed to help you be more intentional to tap into all God has for you in the gift of your marriage.

Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out now! Grab your copy HERE! 

Related episodes you might like: 

What is Team Language? | Ep. 501

Make the Most of Your Differences with Special Guests Jay & Breona Washington | Ep. 476

Wives Edition: How to Ask For Help

Has marriage been harder than you thought it would be? We often say there’s hope for every marriage, no matter where you are today - and there truly is. But you may be wondering how exactly to hold on and fight for your marriage if you’re in a really hard season. Today, we are sharing Dr. Kim’s conversation with special guest Toni Nieuwhof. 

Toni is an author, speaker and family law mediator, and she brings such hope and wisdom in today’s episode. Tune in for hope and help to make the future of your marriage better than today. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The mental shift helped Toni and her husband keep fighting when their marriage was on the brink

Practical steps they took to start healing 

Common issues Toni sees couples divorce over 

How to change your mental narrative about your marriage 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Get more of Toni’s wisdom on this topic in her book, “Before You Split” 

On her website at https://toninieuwhof.com/ 

And on the Smart Family Podcast 

Are you willing to do what it takes to reset and renew your marriage? Fight for your marriage with the  Marriage 911 online course.

Missed the other episodes of our summer Worth Repeating Series? So far we’ve aired: 

Worth Repeating | Be Your Authentic Self in a Superficial World With Special Guest Sam Acho

Worth Repeating | Breathe: Don’t Be Prickly

Worth Repeating: Cultivating Curiosity & Courage with Special Guest Bob Goff

How can curiosity help you have an awesome marriage? How can you grow yourself and your marriage, even in the busyness and life’s changing seasons? As we share some of our favorite past episodes this summer, we are so happy to re-air Dr. Kim’s interview with Bob Goff. Bob and Dr. Kim talked about how to dream big, be courageous and grow closer with your spouse. Don’t miss their encouraging conversation today - it’s certainly worth repeating! 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The role curiosity plays  in keeping you - and your marriage - interesting 

Learning to align your dreams as a couple 

What to do if you don’t have any big dreams to chase

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage

Find Bob @ bobgoff.com

Check out Maria’s new book, Love Lives Here

Dr. Kim especially liked Bob’s book Everybody Always

Missed the other episodes of our summer Worth Repeating Series? So far we’ve aired: 

Worth Repeating | Be Your Authentic Self in a Superficial World With Special Guest Sam Acho

Worth Repeating | Breathe: Don’t Be Prickly

One common theme we hear from our couples at Awesome Marriage is that life and marriage have been difficult the past few years. The unexpected and unpredictable realities have taken a toll on many of us, and the anxiety and angst have made us quite “prickly.”  In today’s episode, Dr. Kim and Christina talk about that prickliness and help you evaluate if you’ve been a little prickly and if so, how to work through it. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Defining exactly what we mean by “prickly” 

Dr. Kim shares some healthy ways to deal with the pain

Red flags that can help show us our prickliness 

What do I do if this is me? What if it’s my spouse? 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out now! Click HERE to grab your copy! 

27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage

We’re on our annual summer break from the podcast, and during the break we love to re-air favorite past episodes. Today we’re sharing Dr. Kim’s conversation with former NFL linebacker Sam Acho, a speaker, podcaster, and humanitarian. They had an honest and encouraging conversation about what holds us back from being authentic and how to break through fears and be more real. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The breakthrough that first helped Sam to stop hiding & pretending he was ok 

Why the closest relationships can also be the places we feel the most insecure

Why the small steps we take to be real are actually big!

Steps to take when you feel you’re not living in authenticity 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out TODAY!! Click HERE to grab your copy! 

27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage 

Sam & Dr. Kim talked today about his book, Let the World See You, and he also has a new book, Change Starts With You: Following Your Fire to Heal a Broken World

Find Sam on Twitter and Instagram @thesamacho

Marriage is more of a marathon than a sprint, and to go the distance, it definitely helps to learn from someone who has gone before. Who better to learn from than Dr. Kim? He and Nancy are more than 50 years into marriage, and continue to have so much fun together. It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it! Today Dr. Kim shares his top 5 ways to build a marriage you love that will stand the test of time. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Practically speaking, how do you put “God first, spouse second”? 

Is the goal to just stay together - or to keep making the marriage better and better? 

The power of looking forward to something together 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

RESOURCES 

Dr. Kim and Nancy's book Love, Intimacy, and Sex in the Second Half is out! Click HERE to order your copy! 

When it comes to having fun and not taking things too seriously, Dr. Kim and Nancy have got receipts! See all the shenanigans on TikTok and Instagram :)

Want to have more fun with your marriage? Our 14 Days of Marriage Fun resource helps you break up the routine and enjoy more fun and laughter together! 

Recovery after porn is possible. Your mind can heal and you can break the addiction. Today’s guest, Matt Cline, is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, which leads men and women out of sexual brokenness and into a life of freedom and impact. Matt has seen countless lives radically changed around the world.Today he talks about his healing process, how God restored his beliefs about sex 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The God-given purpose of our sex drive - and why that matters

How do you define the actual difference between “sex” and “making love”? 

Lies porn teaches us about sex and how to replace them with truth 

Specific ways the mind changes after porn recovery 

The process of turning temptation into an opportunity for worship 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Find all of Matt’s resources at www.restoredministries.ca

Restored Ministries is on Instagram @restoredsexuality, Facebook @ Restored Ministries, and the Pure Victory Podcast. 

You don’t have to settle for a struggling marriage. The 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan starts right where your marriage is today and helps get it on the road to healing.

Click HERE to preorder Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!

Can your marriage be happy, even after…? Our guest today said that, “About 70% of men in the church are struggling cyclically or addictively with pornography, and about 30% of women. It’s time to stop giving the enemy the power of our silence.” We completely agree! While this story is not easy to tell, letting light into our darkest places is how we will experience the healing God wants for us.

We are so thankful that Dannah shared her story with us this week. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

 The antidote to “I don’t even know what to do” about this 

Does a porn addiction always escalate? And why? 

Some of the science behind why this addiction is so hard to kick 

The impact of betrayal trauma on a spouse 

RESOURCES

If porn use has damaged your marriage, you may struggle to feel close and to re-engage in sexual intimacy. You know that healing is possible, but how do you get there?

Today Dr. Kim shares ways that couples can overcome the hurt caused by porn and re-establish the intimacy that will make the marriage thrive again. Time and again, we have seen couples restored, and their marriage even better than before. Tune in today and learn how this can be true for your marriage too. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

Episode highlights include: 

Overcoming intrusive thoughts and insecurities 

How porn and comparison are similar 

Why the marriage can be better than before after healing from this  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Do you love the Bible app as much as we do? Do not miss Dr. Kim’s Verse of the Day on YouVersion Friday! 

Keep your marriage thriving for the long haul! Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!

Has the Awesome Marriage podcast helped your marriage? If so, will you take a moment to leave us a rating and review? They take just a moment to leave, but they do make an difference in getting the show in front of more people. 

In Spotify, click the “star” icon right under the show’s heading

On Apple Podcasts, scroll down to the “Ratings & Reviews” section of the show page

Don’t settle for a struggling marriage. The 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan is affordable, practical, and starts right where your marriage is today to get it on the road to healing. 

Porn use is a pain point for all too many marriages. Today we talk about how to begin healing and rebuilding trust if porn has damaged your marriage. We have seen countless marriages restored from this issue, and we believe God can do the same for you and your marriage. Tune in to learn how you can begin to trust again. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

The key to knowing if your spouse has changed and is trustworthy

What if they haven’t changed? 

Why confession is vital to healing and freedom  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

If you are ready to be free from porn, our friends at Restored Ministries offer several options to help both. Please do not hesitate to reach out. 

If your marriage has been affected by infidelity, our online Affair Recovery Course can help. This course is helpful whether you’re just starting the recovery process, or are already in process. Use code: “AWESOMEMARRIAGE” for %10 off.

Has the Awesome Marriage podcast helped your marriage? If so, will you take a moment to leave us a rating and review? They take just a moment to leave, but they do make an difference in getting the show in front of more people. 

In Spotify, click the “star” icon right under the show’s heading

On Apple Podcasts, scroll down to the “Ratings & Reviews” section of the show page

Learn how to keep your marriage strong for the long haul! Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!

We know this topic is a painful one for all too many marriages, and we also know that God can bring full healing if your marriage has been damaged by porn. Today Dr. Kim shares how he’s seen porn impact marriages over the years, why it’s always a problem if it’s part of a marriage, and how to start breaking free. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

Why porn use is never a one-person issue 

Why keeping porn use secret makes it harder to stop using 

Addressing common cultural myths about porn such as, “everyone does it” and “it doesn’t hurt anyone”

Steps to breaking free if you are using porn

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

If you are ready to be free from porn, our friends at Restored Ministries offer several options to help both. Please do not hesitate to reach out. 

If your marriage has been affected by infidelity, our online Affair Recovery Course can help. This course is helpful whether you’re just starting the recovery process, or are already in process. Use code: “AWESOMEMARRIAGE” for %10 off.

Great things are happening on the Awesome Marriage Podcast this summer! In this quick update Dr. Kim and I pop in to talk about what you can expect and what you'll be hearing over the next few weeks. Plus an exciting announcement from Dr. Kim!

We pray these episodes are helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Learn to make your marriage strong for the long haul -- Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half. 

If you need anything from us, don’t hesitate to reach out at info@awesomemarriage.com

When Eric and Erikah Rivera met and started dating as high school sweethearts, they sensed God’s call on their lives. But they did not know how it would all unfold. Today they are church planters in their hometown of Chicago, and they graciously share their story of how God has met them in the midst of unexpected fear and pain, and the ways He has worked in each circumstance. Don’t miss this encouraging conversation with the Riveras. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

How sharing their fears and grief with each other led to increased faith

Unexpected ways God can use our trials when we invite Him to 

Should the disciple be known as “Doubting Thomas” or “Ride-or-Die Thomas”?  

When God doesn’t answer our prayers the way we hope  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Application Questions:  

What fears are underlying in your heart and mind today? What prevents you from speaking them? 

Where do you need to see Jesus show up in your life today? In your marriage? 

How do you need support in those things in your marriage today? 

How can you better support your spouse in the things they are dealing with today? 

RESOURCES

Hear more on the Brook Church website and YouTube Channel 

This week we conclude our powerful Unpacking the Baggage series with some details on the process of unpacking marriage baggage, and dealing with what’s underneath. I’m so thankful for Dr. Kim’s biblical wisdom on this topic, as well as the excellent guests we heard from this month. If you missed the previous episodes of this series, make sure to go back and listen for some powerful wisdom on how to heal your heart and your marriage. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

Episode highlights include: 

Some of the physical signals that can help us prevent overreactions 

Slowing down the process to identify relationship triggers 

How to begin healing from relationship triggers and figure out what’s underneath

What to do if you don’t know what’s underneath   

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

The L.O.V.E. Your Way Through Marriage Course, by Chris and Jamie Bailey, is a journey of connecting and learning all the necessary steps to start having healthy conflict. Use promo code AWESOMEMARRIAGE for 10% off!

When we carry parts of our past with us, it still affects us into today. If we aren’t talking about how the past is for each spouse pushing its way into the present, then we’re probably not getting to the depth of the truth of what’s really going on.

Dr. Kelly Flanagan is a repeat guest on the podcast, and today he shares some transformative steps to dealing with what’s under the surface, and helping your spouse to do the same. Don’t miss this helpful episode! 

Episode highlights include: 

Do we really need to bring up old stuff from the past? Why does it matter now? 

Is your heart open to your spouse, or closed? 

What are steps to helping a spouse deal with their baggage? 

What does it mean to “hold space” for your spouse? Plus why and how to do that

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Find more of Dr. Kelly’s resources, including the Loveable Mini Course, at his website: Drkellyflanagan.com

Get Dr. Kelly’s newest book, The Unhiding of Elijah Campbell 

How can disappointment or unmet expectations in marriage lead us to God’s healing? Our marriage will only be as healthy as the two people in it, and God wants to restore and heal our hearts. We’re delighted to have John and Stasi Eldredge on the podcast today. The Eldredges share so much wisdom and their personal experiences with God’s healing power in their lives and their marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

How to navigate expectations for your marriage and the hurt they can bring 

How to take pressure off your spouse and your marriage

he two great conversions in the Christian life

What they would have missed if they had called it quits  

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

RESOURCES

Dr. Kim highly recommends Pause App, by the Eldredges

Check out their site, www.wildatheart.org - it is full of SO many great resources for you! 

When we carry parts of our past with us, they still affect us today. You may know there is something going on, but not know what it is. You may sense your spouse has something they are carrying or you might be affected by unresolved conflict in your shared past. Today Dr. Kim shares how these things shape our marriage relationships and what we can do about them.

Episode highlights include: 

 Ever been picked last at recess? Yeah, us too. But do things like that matter in our marriages? 

Why aren’t we dealing with this stuff already? 

What happens if we don’t deal with our past hurt

Is it okay to talk about our spouse’s baggage if they don’t bring it up? 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our 4 Week Connection Challenge for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

This is the FB Live video with Chris and Jamie Bailey that we referred to dealing with Emotional Rationalization 

Colossians 2:6-10 

Ephesians 4:20-24 

John 16:33

James 1:2-5  

Here's what's coming up in the next several weeks on the Awesome Marriage Podcast! I'll share which guests will be appearing on the podcast and a snippet of what they'll talk about. This series is full of warmth and wisdom, so make sure to tune into each episode!  

How can just three words help strengthen your emotional, spiritual and mental health? Not only that, but Pastor Mark Batterson says they can shift the tide and change everything. Please, Sorry, Thanks is the name of Pastor Mark Batterson’s new book, and he is here today with Dr. Kim, sharing why it’s worth devoting an entire book to three of the first words many of us were taught growing up! Don’t miss this powerful episode. 

Episode highlights include: 

Practices to better position ourselves to hear God’s voice over the world’s noise 

The psychology of please, the science of sorry, and the theology of thanks

The antidote to bitterness, and the lasting impacts of unconfessed bitterness 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

RESOURCES

For some guidance to try Mark’s idea of asking great questions, try our 52 Questions For Your Family Table. These are designed to help you ask great questions and engage in interesting conversation! 

If you enjoyed this episode, you will love Mark’s new book Please, Sorry, Thanks!

So many parents know the pain of a broken relationship with their adult child. This isn’t how you thought it would go, and you’re not sure how to love your child when they continue to break your heart. Today Dr. David E Clarke returns to the podcast to give some biblical steps that parents can take, individually or as a couple, with their prodigal child. 

Episode highlights include: 

10 scenarios that can cause relational disconnect with your adult child

Steps to repairing your relationship when you’ve fallen short 

Resolving parental guilt - and what happens if you fail to do so

Forgiving the adult child that has broken your heart 

What role do other family members play? 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

More on this topic can be found in Dr. Clarke's book: Adult Children Who Break Your Heart 

www.davideclarkephd.com

Today we tackle listener questions about how to practically apply boundaries in specific marriage situations. Dr. Kim gives some great starting points to help you deal with situations that you may be facing where a boundary would help, but you just don’t know what that boundary should be, or how to set it. 

Episode highlights include: 

Decision-making boundaries with in-laws 

Dealing with a controlling parent

How to address an unmet promise without nagging

Finding creative solutions to address marriage pain points

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. 

Our new Boundaries Workbook Guide helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage.

Today on the podcast, we’re sharing real stories of marriage boundaries that couples used to help their marriage grow healthier. Dr. Kim and I each share some of our own experiences, and we will hear from 4 members of the Awesome Marriage team about boundaries that helped their marriage.    

Episode highlights include: 

The money mindset that set Dr. Kim and Nancy up for success together

A simple way to transition from your work-from-home to family time  

Lindsay and Christina share practical boundaries for couples in ministry 

Dr. Kim and Lindsay have opposite takes on one thing their spouses do

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. 

Our new Boundaries Guide helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage.

The 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle launches today! It’s available for 2 weeks only, so don’t miss the chance to get 7 of our most-loved resources for just one donation. https://awesomemarriage.com/2023-april-bundle

Today we’re going to get into what healthy boundaries do and do NOT look like. We will troubleshoot the confusion and frustration that boundaries can bring when they’re not working like they should, and tell you what to do about it. 

Episode highlights include: 

We unpack some reasons you might avoid setting boundaries

Red flags that you are doing boundaries wrong

How to clarify the importance of the issues you discuss

When you have assumed your spouse knows your boundaries

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. Dr. Kim covers why and how and gives practical tips and examples to help you put them in place. 

Our new Boundaries Guide helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage. 

For more information on boundaries, Henry Cloud and John Townsend’s book, Boundaries is an immensely helpful time-tested staple.   

Do you ever get a little defensive when your spouse disagrees with you? Marriage disagreements get real because we can’t just ignore what we don’t agree on like we can with an acquaintance. Today Mike Donehey joins Dr. Kim on the podcast and shares gospel-centered wisdom that shows us a better way to disagree.

Episode highlights include: 

How Christians should handle defensiveness 

A great way to diffuse an argument as soon as it begins 

What can happen when we take the time to really hear the other person’s argument 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

RESOURCES

Read Mike’s book, Grace in the Gray: A More Loving Way to Disagree

Find Mike at MikeDonehey.com

Listen to Mike’s podcast, Chasing the Beauty 

Today we get into the details of how to carry out healthy boundary setting. We continue the series on healthy boundaries by talking about logistics of how to set and carry out the boundaries our marriages need.

We’ll talk about how to do this conversation well, and what NOT to do when you talk about them. Tune in to hear how to set these well to help you and your marriages to be their healthiest. 

What do you want to hear more about before we close this series? Let me know! 

Episode highlights include: 

Dr. Kim gives several examples of how to make boundaries enforceable

Practical dos and don'ts of a boundaries conversation

What to do if your spouse doesn’t agree to your boundaries or respect them 

Ways for in-laws to deal with boundaries involving their married kids 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

A helpful companion episode: What is Team Language? | Ep. 501

Our Boundaries Guide walks through the topics we’ve covered through this series and helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage. 

We talk to a lot of couples who don't know what makes them a great team, so we created Team You & Me: A Guide to Approaching Your Marriage as a Team, to help you be more intentional to tap into all God has for you in the gift of your marriage.

Our Conflict Solving Survey & Workbook provides more help to work on healthy and effective conflict resolution together.

Several types of boundaries can help your marriage be healthy, and today we’re talking about boundaries outside of marriage. That means with family, friends, and the opposite sex. We could probably devote an entire episode to each of these categories! We definitely can’t cover every possibility, but we can get the conversation started. 

Episode highlights include: 

Boundaries with your in laws & adult married children

Guidance on setting boundaries with your kids at any age

Basic boundaries for co-parenting with an ex 

Dr. Kim’s recommendations for affair prevention boundaries 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. Dr. Kim covers why and how and gives practical tips and examples to help you put them in place.

Get 25 of Dr Kim’s best conflict resolution tips in our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet! 

Our new Boundaries Guide helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage.  

Our friends Dan & Kay at Centsei can help you set a budget and stick with good financial boundaries.

We talk to a lot of couples who don't know what makes them a great team, so we created Team You & Me: A Guide to Approaching Your Marriage as a Team, to help you be more intentional to tap into all God has for you in the gift of your marriage.

There are several types of boundaries that you need to have within your marriage. Chances are you already have some. But there may be pain points in your marriage that healthy boundaries can help. Today we cover a lot of ground as we get into the details of some boundaries that may be needed within your marriage to help you, your spouse and your marriage be your healthiest. 

Episode highlights include: 

Ways to approach a conversation about free time and hobbies without a fight

The most common areas where most couples might need boundaries

Signs that you need a boundary in a given area

How NOT to do your budget together 

Plus - Do you have a hobby to answer my question at the end of the episode? I’m so curious - there’s bound to be one! 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

 *Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Get 25 of Dr Kim’s best conflict resolution tips in our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet! 

Our new Boundaries Guide helps you decide where and how to start applying this content to your marriage. 

Our friends Dan & Kay at Centsei can help you set a budget and stick with good financial boundaries.

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. Dr. Kim covers why and how and gives practical tips and examples to help you put them in place.

We talk to a lot of couples who don't know what makes them a great team, so we created Team You & Me: A Guide to Approaching Your Marriage as a Team, to help you be more intentional to tap into all God has for you in the gift of your marriage.

What are the rhythms of your marriage? Whether you know what they are or not, you have rhythms, and they are shaping who you will become as a couple. Today on the podcast Chris and Jenni Graebe join Dr. Kim to talk about five rhythms for a healthy marriage, and how you can work together to get in the groove. 

Episode highlights include: 

What are the 5 rhythms? 

How to talk about issues in your marriage without starting a fight 

Why speaking life is such an important rhythm, and why it affects more than your marriage. 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Grab Chris and Jenni’s book, The Rhythm of Us to get all the details of today’s conversation, how to put them into your marriage, and more! 

Check out Chris & Jenni’s Rhythm of Us Podcast

TheRhythmofUs.com 

Use the Marriage Quiz to discover the #1 rhythm missing in your marriage at marriagequiz.com

Today we’re kicking off a series about boundaries in marriage. What they are, what they are not, and why they are essential in a healthy marriage. We get a lot of questions on the topic, and in this series we will share the types of boundaries that can help a marriage, and how to implement them. This series will be full of practical applications and we’d love to answer your questions. 

Episode highlights include: 

What can boundaries do for your marriage? 

What can they NOT do? 

Dr. Kim’s take on an age old example of physical affection at unwelcome times 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet contains 25 of Dr. Kim’s best tips to help you fight fair and resolve conflict well 

Learn all about how to set healthy boundaries for your marriage with our Building Better Boundaries For Your Marriage online course. Dr. Kim covers why and how and gives practical tips and examples to help you put them in place.

For more help troubleshooting the conflict in your marriage, our Conflict Solving Survey and Workbook helps evaluate where you are now, see where you want to grow, and learn how to get from here to there. 

In today’s episode we mentioned this: How to Set Boundaries in One-Sided Marriage | Ep. 505. In it we give more biblical context for boundaries.

Our 4-day YouVersion plan on Boundaries in Marriage can help you put healthy boundaries into practice.

We’re dropping in today to share a brief overview of our upcoming “Boundaries For Your Marriage” series. We get a lot of questions on the topic, and in this series we will share types of boundaries that can help a marriage, and how to implement them. 

The series will cover: What boundaries are and why they matter for your marriage, boundaries within marriage, boundaries outside of marriage, how to set boundaries, what NOT to do, plus an episode devoted to answering your questions. Please subscribe to our Podcast Email if you have not already, as we provide application questions to help make each episode applicable to you, as well as other bonus content. 

We pray this series will be helpful to you and your marriage!

*Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our 4 Week Connection Challenge for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

It is Valentine’s Day! And today we’re talking about how to put love in action in your marriage. It’s safe to assume you love your spouse - even if they drive you crazy sometimes! But how well do you put your love into action in a way that speaks to them? Showing love to your spouse is not just a once a year thing, so today we’re talking about practical ways to do this in your everyday life. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.  

Episode highlights include: 

What does your spouse want you to do with their love language? 

What if the spouse doesn’t respond well?

Is there a name for the “love language” of seeing your spouse engage with the kids? 

Plus an anonymous listener question about why a spouse never says “I love you” 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!  

RESOURCES

Our Love Cans can help you learn to put love in action in your marriage! Find out what fills your spouse’s love tank so that you can intentionally make deposits of that lovin’ feeling! 

5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman 

Make this Valentine’s weekend fun and engaging with a lasting impact with the Online Marriage Retreat!

Whether it’s illness, aging, or another physical issue, there are some physical obstacles that can prevent couples from enjoying a great sex life together. Today we address several common physical barriers to a great sex life in your marriage, and provide practical ways to address them and enjoy God’s gift of sex in your marriage! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our 4 Week Connection Challenge for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Abuse of any kind is entirely inconsistent with God’s plan for marriage, as described in Scripture. Today Dr. David E. Clarke returns to the podcast to debunk reasons that godly women give for staying with their abusive spouse. Dr. Clarke has counseled so many spouses who have been taught that God wants them to remain with an abuser, so today he explains a clear, biblical basis for separation from an ungodly, unrepentant, narcissistic, or dangerous spouse. Listen to learn about confronting the lies that keep you with an abuser. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Today Dr. Kim answers the question, “Do Christians have to stay married, no matter what?” We have heard from several listeners who are in difficult, painful and even abusive marriages. Some said their spouse takes advantage of knowing they will continue to stay as a rationale for continuing harmful patterns.

This topic is complicated and nuanced, but there are some clear biblical principles about marriage that can help to navigate a response to these painful situations. Listen to learn more. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

We are so happy to be back with a new episode of the podcast in the new year! Today we get to hear the story of a real couple whose marriage was restored after infidelity. Adam and Kristi share the complete story of their marriage, and how God worked through their hardest situation to bring redemption.

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Statistically, odds are not good for a couple processing grief together. Today Kerry and Chris Shook join Dr. Kim on the podcast. In this powerfully encouraging episode, they share how they handled a painful season of grief losing their grandson, Jude, who lived just one day on earth, and how they were shaped, along with their family, through the loss. Kerry and Chris are pastors and co-authors of The Gift of One Day: How to Find Hope When Life Gets Hard.

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

The Christmas season is like no other! Today we’re sharing some ways we love to celebrate, our favorite traditions, past mistakes and mishaps, and how we have handled some of the challenges of the season. Plus we get to hear from two very special guests – each of our spouses join us for the first time on the podcast!  

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Today we’re tackling some of the really tough questions that listeners have submitted. We love answering listener questions, and Dr. Kim often answers one at the end of our episodes. This episode is a little different, since these are all questions that warrant more than a quick answer. While there are some hard realities, we also believe that there is hope for every marriage. Wherever your marriage is today, we believe God has hope and redemption for you!   

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Research shows that 69% of marital conflict is never resolved. We either sweep it under the rug, avoid the pain points, or get stuck in a cycle of conflict that may cause pain but not find resolution. Today Dr. Kim talks with special guest Anne Nelson, about the 4-stage process to break the fight cycle and heal your marriage from conflict. Anne is a Christian counselor who helps couples and individuals to find the fully thriving life God has for them. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Today Dr. Kim welcomes return guests Levi and Jennie Lusko to the podcast. In this episode, they talk about their new book, The Marriage Devotional, and answer why they wrote a marriage devotional, how that process affected their marriage, the power of scripture in marriage gift God gave us, and much more!

Don’t miss this deeply encouraging episode! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

What are some of the major mistakes we hope couples avoid during dating and engagement? Today we’re talking all about unrealistic expectations. How can we tell when our expectations are unrealistic, and what can we do to keep them from becoming an issue in our relationships? 

This one trips up about every couple at some point, so even if you’re married, this episode will be helpful to recognize, and deal with our expectations in a healthy and helpful way. Tune in for all the details on how not to let this major mistake wreck your relationship. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage!

Episode highlights include: 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

What are some of the major mistakes we hope couples avoid during dating and engagement? Today we’re talking about what it means to focus on the wrong things. What are they, and why are we saying they’re wrong?

In Dr. Kim’s counseling experience, he’s seen some things that are just not helpful for engaged couples, so today he’s telling us some of the things he sees engaged couples focusing on that aren’t helpful to their future marriage. Spoiler alert: No matter where you are today, there is hope! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

What are some of the major mistakes we hope couples avoid during dating and engagement? Today we’re looking at a big one: Ignoring red flags. Thankfully, Dr. Kim has counseled so many engaged couples over the years, and has created our Preparing For Marriage online course. So today he sheds light on several common red flags and how to deal with them. Spoiler alert: No matter where you are today, there is hope! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

“The storms will hit. It’s not a threat, it’s just a reality,” as Gary Thomas shares with us today.

When they do, we want our marriages to be a refuge where we take comfort. In this episode, Gary Thomas tells us how to make sure your marriage is a safe haven for you and your spouse, rather than a source of pain and conflict. His latest book tells real-life stories of marriages that overcame hardship to become a fortress.

We believe this is what God wants for each marriage and what he wants for you! Don’t miss this encouraging episode! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!

Resources: 

Have you gotten bad marriage advice? We sure have! We’ve heard so many things that just aren’t helpful for marriage, but we didn’t always realize it! Trying to follow a harmful piece of marriage will damage your marriage over time. So today we call out bad marriage advice, give ways to prevent yourself from falling prey to it, and help you determine what's good advice, and what's worth tossing out. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Men and women tend to view intimacy differently, so it takes intentionality to understand one another well. We want to help the wives out this week by looking at 3 ways to do intimacy his way. How can you build these into marriage? Today’s episode will help you bring intimacy from idea into action. Tune in to learn more! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Men and women typically view intimacy differently, and it takes intentionality to understand one another well. We want to help the husbands out this week by looking at 3 ways to do intimacy her way. This episode is worth repeating since it answers one of the toughest parts of marriage. How can you build these into marriage? Today’s episode will help you bring intimacy from idea into action. Tune in to learn more! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!  

Resources: 

Are you part of a blended family? Having a blended family brings unique challenges and that’s why we’re so thankful for our friends Scott and Vanessa Martindale sharing their wisdom on the topic today! Scott and Vanessa founded Blended Kingdom Families, where they offer practical strategies and Biblical encouragement for blended families. Don’t miss this helpful episode! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

What did you hope for and dream of when you got married? Is your marriage all you dreamed it would be? For so many, it is not. It’s easy to think it might be easier for other couples, but a good marriage takes time, energy, and hard work. There’s hope for your marriage no matter where you are today, because as Dr. Kim shares with us, God hasn’t given up on any marriage! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

{Editor's Note: Audio was repaired 11/2023.} So much of life is not what happens to us, but how we respond to it. Life is hard and it never seems to go exactly according to our plans. My grandad said that we all have the choice to either get bitter, or get better. And he lived out what it looks like to get better, even in the face of all of life’s troubles.

Today Dr. Kim shares what ongoing bitterness looks like over time, and how we can avoid becoming grouchy, grumpy, and mean! 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

P.S. I misquoted his age in the episode - my grandad lived to 94½ before he went to heaven last year! 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

What are the pros and cons of having kids? Can you know if you’re really ready? Today Dr. Kim and I discuss how to know and how we each went through that process with our spouse. We share some practical ways to get on the same page with your spouse, as well as some of our favorite parts of being parents. Listen in to learn more!

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Matt Hammitt had a successful music career as frontman of the Grammy and Dove-award-winning band Sanctus Real, but he knew God was calling him away from his career and toward something else. The wake up call happened when he started realizing he was not the man he intended to be. Today Matt opens up about the process of following God’s lead in leading his family well. Tune in for his encouraging story!    

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Resources: 

Today we’re answering listener-submitted questions about our Healthy Self / Healthy Marriage series. We have talked about physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health, and they all overlap, so we have questions from every area. There are some really tough ones, so we’re going to do our best to give clear and helpful answers today, as Dr. Kim shares great biblical counsel for the questions sent in from our listeners. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

Mental health impacts every aspect of our life, so it will certainly impact our marriage. I am so thankful for Dr. Kim’s deep experience with this topic! In this episode we covered everything from how to know when to work on things ourselves, when to seek help, and effective but practical ways to boost mental health in everyday life. Tune in to learn more. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.

Make sure you subscribe to Podcast Email so you never miss an episode. When you sign up, we’ll send you our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free as a sign up bonus, plus you get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox each week! 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

The healthiest marriages are between two healthy people. This week we’re unpacking why it’s so hard to be spiritually healthy without emotional health. The two are linked because a lack of knowing ourselves will seriously hinder our ability to connect with God and others. It’s a lot simpler, more accessible, and less touchy-feely than it may sound. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

Today Dr. Kim and I are talking about how physical health impacts a marriage. It turns out we’re both passionate about pursuing good stewardship with physical health! Dr. Kim shares some of the struggles he and Nancy have had to deal with and how they worked through them, and I share how going from a mentality of body shame to one of gratitude shifted how I approach physical health. 

Episode highlights include: 

We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our “5 Days 5 Ways” Love Languages resource for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES